


Of all people in the world

by caramelodrama



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Substance Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-12
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-27 01:24:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 27,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19780366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caramelodrama/pseuds/caramelodrama
Summary: “Of all people in the world what is it exactly that makes us believe that this one person is the right person for us? What is it that makes us want to share a life with someone?”They knew each other for a lifetime and yet...





	1. A wedding

“Of all people in the world what is it exactly that makes us believe that this one person is the right person for us? What is it that makes us want to share a life with someone?”

That were Sansa’s thoughts while she was hearing the professor explain about the foundations of envy and betrayal in Shakespeare’s romances.

“I shouldn’t have taken this class” she thought “I should have taken something less about the imaginary world and more about the real world, something more pragmatic, something that will make a concrete difference in my life and in my family’s… situation”

Now, thinking about that really made her sad. It would be a year and a half soon. A year and a half that her father had died and disgrace had fallen upon her family.

Eddard Stark. Ned. Her father was the most honorable and most rightful person Sansa had ever known. She admired her father greatly. He was the owner and CEO of Stark Industries, their family business that used to be one of the greatest enterprises in their country employing thousands of people and generating millions of dollars a year.

But it all went to hell when he was caught up in the middle of a billionaire Ponzi’s scheme. He was considered a criminal and all of the family’s assets were frozen. Commercial partners disappeared, associates and even old friends withdrew themselves from them. Her family was alone.

Her father couldn’t take the news, his heart couldn’t. He had a heart attack and died soon after they informed him that he would have to wait for his trial in jail.

Her mother was inconsolable. She kept saying that he was mislead into the scheme as a back up for Cersei Baratheon, widow of a great friend of his that told him she was in need. Ned would never turn his back at his best friend’s widow. He was mislead by Cersei. He didn’t do anything wrong, how could people treat him as a criminal?

Sansa remembered that there was a moment that she doubted her father. And they had a fight a day before he received the news about his arrest. She didn’t have the chance to make peace with him, ask him to forgive her for the things she said. She regretted it so much, and it was something that even now teared her soul apart, she felt like crying. But she couldn’t.

People in her uni already though that she was a crazy dramatic girl – thanks for that, dear ex – on the top of her family’s scandal, she would not give them the satisfaction of seeing her breaking down.

She sucked this down feeling and started prepare to leave class. She was one of the last people to do so, she took her time placing her things in her backpack and leaving the room slowly. She was so distracted she almost missed a tall boy with short dark hair and dark eyes

“Theon!” she said in surprise. He smiled a crooked smile back at her and waved his hand. She continued “I didn’t knew you were back”

“Yeah, I just returned…” he paused “You ok?”

“Yeah, I just…” she paused “I’m happy you are back”. He smiled and she could swear he was a little embarassed. “He changed” she thought “old Theon would just smirk or make an ironic joke on her” and she returned to talk to him “I bet the campus didn’t change much”

“Not at all…” he shook his head smilling. But then, he turned very serious. “Sansa. Robb messaged me. Are you going to…?” he didn’t finish the sentence

“I am. I have to. He called the meeting at our home. Winterfell… I can’t believe he’s going to do that and make it official to our family” yes, she wanted to cry.

Theon looked just as miserable as she did. “I don’t think he has any other option…”

Sansa looked at him heartbroken. That really hurt him. “I know… But he shouldn’t have to do that! He doesn’t deserves this… It’s Robb we’re talking about!”

“Yeah I know…”

She continued “He should marry someone he _loves_. Not a girl he has never met just so his father would do business with us…”

“No one else wants to Sansa… and if things continue like this, most likely you will have to sell the company” there was sorrow in his voice.

She wouldn’t take it. A tear fell on her cheek.

“I know Theon, but it shouldn’t be this way”.

Not to Robb… Robb that worked his ass off to graduate in half a year instead of the 2 years (that would be wise and recommended) and studied day and night like crazy for that. Robb, that did this just to be able to take over the company and try to save it. “There are people, families that depend on us. We can’t abandon the, we can’t let them down.” he said

Robb that had to fight every day to keep Stark industries running and did this all alone, far from home. She never saw Robb anymore, he was so busy. Robb that gave away his own dreams for the sake of her family and was willing to give away his happiness as well…

He hugged her. Gently and warmly and she felt so thankful to him because she could let the tears flow without worrying about what people might think of her.

“Are you coming too?” she asked him as the feelings inside her started to calm down.

“Yes. He asked me to”

She smiled a sad smile.

“Can we go together?”

“Sure. That’s why I came here. I was gonna offer you a ride.” He paused “If you want it from me, of course.”

“Of course I want it, Theon”


	2. Roads

Sansa placed her luggage and the entered Theon’s car. It was clean and neat. “he’s good now” she thought.

He noticed that she paid attention to it, he smiled and said

“I cleaned it”

She frowned and joked

“Thank God!”

He didn’t joke back. That made her a little sad. “He’s good, but he’s still not himself 100%”. A shadow crossed her mind “Will he ever? Will I ever?”

He said “Yeah…. If you want you can choose the soundtrack”

“I can’t believe it!” he was so picky with music. It was his thing. Just as books were her thing. “But I will leave it to you. Your music taste is good”

That apparently made him happy, but he just replied “As you wish”

They were in silence. But it was not an awkward silence. Sure they wanted to ask many things to one another, but they could just as well be there in silence, just the 2 of them.

It’s strange, they grew up together, since Theon was Robb’s best friend and Sansa was Robb’s little sister and Theon practically lived in their home, but they never interacted much with one another. They knew the other existed, but that was it.

Also, Theon had a rebellious teenager phase that he went to parties and picked up random girls almost every night and that drew Sansa away from him.

How could he do that so easily, no emotional attachment? That just didn’t make sense to her that was a huge romantic. She wanted the feeling of being swoon away, the butterflies in her stomach, the feeling of locking eyes with the one person in a crowded room and knowing that it was the person. She wanted the fairytale.

And honestly a guy bragging on how many girls he hooked up and how he got them was absolutely not that.

She could see that even Robb was getting tired of his stories, but Robb kept saying it was just a phase and that Theon was doing that because he felt a little lost considering his fucked up family…

Sansa didn’t understand back them, but she understood now. His father was horrible and don’t even start with his uncle. All he had was his sister, but…

He pulled her out of her thoughts

“Is Arya also coming?”

“I don’t know. She hasn’t replied my messages or returned my phone calls in ages… I called Jon and he was so… strange and vague about her. I just hope she’s ok. I know I haven’t been the best big sister, but…”

“No, Sansa…” Theon said trying to comfort her somehow

“I really love her” she said

“Arya is strong, I’m sure she is fine” he said

Arya had just started uni when their father died. She immediately dropped it and decided she would go north to stay with Jon. She claimed that somehow together they would find a way to clear father’s name out to the Ponzi scheme.

Their mother was shocked, but she didn’t have the strength to fight Arya in her decision. She had so many things to do, problems to solve, decisions she had to make. All alone now. She was not ready for this. Nor did Robb that had only saving Stark Industries on his mind. Sansa felt it was not her place to try to talk Arya down on this, after all, Sansa felt like he had been running away from the problems that came upon her family.

Jon decided long ago that he would take sometime off before starting university and he wanted to see the world, find himself. He travelled extensively and ultimately settled in the north helping his girlfriend Ygritte running a shop that belonged to her family.

Not what you would expect from a Stark, right? But Jon seemed happy and free and that was enough for old Ned.

Ned was Jon’s uncle. Jon was the son of Ned’s sister Lyanna with an unknown man. Ned always said that she was beautiful and brilliant and brave, but never said a thing about Jon’s father. Jon never asked because he knew that would make Ned sad.

Lyanna died soon after Jon was born that’s why Jon was raised with Ned’s children and that’s why he was a brother to them. But Sansa knew that Jon had his own demons, his own doubts about his place in the world that he didn’t share with anyone. That’s one of the reasons he went to travel and then went north.

Sansa wanted Jon closer, with family and although she may not understood completely his choices, she respected them.

At least with Jon, Arya would be safe. They always shared a special brother and sister bond. Yes, Arya wouldn’t be ostracized by her friends and feel lonely all the time. Like Sansa did. Even so, Arya most likely wouldn’t care, she would make a scary face at anyone who would even try to mess with her. That was her sister, she thought proudly.

“She _really is_ strong, right?” she said proudly a smile on her lips. He was glad to see her like that.

“So are you” he said looking at her, but when their eyes met, he looked away

“I’m not…” she shook her head in disbelief of what Theon had just told her “I have no idea what to do most of the time… Sometimes I just think I’m a scared little bird in a cage” she smiled sadly

“You’re not” he paused and tried to look her in the eye again. He was taking the courage to do that “Sansa… you gave me strength when I need the most.” Yes, he looked at her right in the eye. Her piercing blue eyes that looked at him so confused.

“What?”


	3. Needed the most

When he needed the most.

Yes, deep in her heart Sansa knew what he was referring to. But she didn’t want to remember.

That day it was almost around 4 A.M. when Robb called her. She answered him, sleepy, thinking 2 things: 1. that something might have happened and 2. that Robb certainly wasn’t sleeping at all because it was 4 A.M. and his voice was very energetic.

“Sansa. Something happened to Theon. They called me because I’m his emergency contact.”

“Oh my God. What happened?” Sansa was fully awake now. At the time, Theon was a blur in her memory that she vaguely remembered. It had been a long time they hadn’t talked or seen each other. But he was someone important to Robb.

“They didn’t give me the details” he continued “just that he’s in a critical condition at the West hospital, it’s near university…”

“I know where it is, I can go there”

“Sorry to be asking you this San, it’s just” his voice was heavy and full of regret for not being able to be there for a friend “I’m very far and the company needs me here…”

“Robb don’t worry, I know how things are, I will take care of Theon, don’t worry!”

“Thank you”

She changed incredibly fast and in less than 20 minutes she was on Theon’s bedside.

Sansa won’t lie, it was pretty bad.

Not only was he badly beaten with open wounds and bruises all over his body, Theon himself was difficult to recognize. He was very, very thin and his skin was grey, his hair was scruffy, long and undone and so was his beard. It seemed like he long forgot how to take care of himself. He was just a shadow of the man he used to be.

Sansa talked briefly to the nurse to be more aware of his condition. He had some ribs broken but no internal injuries. His wounds would heal with time, but… They found cocaine in his blood.

That made Sansa – that was holding up so bravely until now – cry. She didn’t know why. They were not so close, and yet…That explained a lot, but at the same time made her so scared because substance abuse was a whole new story.

-

“That was…”

“Please, don’t say it was nothing…” he said as if he anticipated what she would say.

“Theon, I would never leave you!” she said firmly

“I know. But I also know that you were scared. That seeing me like… _that_ scared you. I know that you didn’t know what to do. I know that you had so many problems of your own to deal and yet you were there to see me every day. In the hospital and then…” he paused and hesitated a little “In the rehab”.

-

It was not difficult to convince Theon to go to rehab. Sansa was prepared to be extra invasive and incisive about it, explaining how important it was, and how he would get better. She passed all the arguments in her head. Twice. But he agreed as soon as she spoke of it. That was a huge relief.

Little did she know that what convinced him more that anything that could ever be said by Sansa or anyone, was he waking up in a hospital and seeing her at his bedside, her head next to his arm, sleeping in a very uncomfortable position and clearly having cried a lot.

That broke his heart.

Why did she, of all people in the world, had to be there? Had to see him that way? Sansa.

He started sobbing, he couldn’t control it anymore. “What the hell am I doing with my life?” was his first thought. The tears rolling down his cheeks, the saltiness of them making his wounds ache a little more.

That woke Sansa.

“Theon...” she looked confused by his reaction “What happened?”

“I’m sorry, Sansa… I-I’m sorry…”

Then she hugged him. He could feel her warm arms around him and her smell. A sweet and familiar smell with a little something citric that reminded him of lemons. Could it be lemon cakes? They were her favorites – _that_ he remembered. But when did he ever forget about her?

Somewhere along the way he forgot about her, about what she meant to him.

But she was right there now, hugging him as his tears wouldn’t stop.

 _“This can never happen again_ ”


	4. Sansa

Sansa Stark. Robb’s little sister. Bookworm that always seemed to be living in a fantasy world of her own. A little selfish and self-centered, always trying to be perfect. Pretty ginger girl with a sweet smile. Always polite to everyone. That’s the Sansa he remembered.

He remembered in many social events her family attended together how everyone praised her on her beauty, on her good education, on her intelligence. She always thanked humbly and politely smiling her sweet smile, and yet Theon always thought that her eyes showed loneliness and insecurity.

He knew because he saw that same thing every time he looked at the mirror.

He remembered when his brothers died in a car accident that Sansa hugged him. She had never hugged him before. He was not sad. He didn’t feel anything. Should he feel anything? Sadness and sorrow for people that although connected by blood, he barely knew and every time they had an interaction threated him with cruelty?

Although at that day he did feel a little empty inside and her hug helped fill it just a little, just a while. That brief moment that he felt her arms around him.

The memories he had about her were just fragments. Her watching movies with Bran and Rickon, playing with the dogs with Arya, putting a blanket on him when he slept in the couch.

Even that time. At Ned Stark’s funeral that her and her mother barely stood on their feet and it seemed like they were supporting one another, that the only thing that made them not crumble to their feet was having the other next to.

At that time Theon himself felt like crumble, Ned was a father figure to him. Someone who showed him affection and offered him guidance when he needed so much. Unlike his blood father.

Sansa.

Theon remembered when Robb was still in college studying like crazy because he wanted to graduate and take over Stark Industries to try to save it. They were roommates. One day Sansa was in their room until late because she was worried about Robb, but she ended up sleeping in Robb’s bed and Theon came late. He had been with a girl and when he arrived Robb said

“Theon? Can you wake Sansa up and take her to her dorm?”

Theon joked

“Why don’t you leave her sleeping here? It’s not like you’re gonna use your bed anyway”

Robb laughed and then turned at Theon. Theon saw how Robb’s eyes were red and tired.

“I don’t want people saying things about my sister”

“Jesus Robb!” Theon rolled his eyes “It’s your room!”

“And yours as well” he said jokingly, but not so much.

“And you trust me to take your sister to her dorm? Me? What if I decide I want to stay at her room?” Theon said joking at Robb

“Yeah. I trust you. And I trust Sansa’s good judgement” he replied seriously and then turned his back at him, back at his laptop “Please, I have to finish this paper. It’s due to tomorrow”.

Theon rolled his eyes. “Fine” and then turned to Sansa who was sleeping peacefully. He felt bad at having to wake her up.

He could clearly see that she was embarrassed to have him escort her to her dorm. They barely talked during the walk. Actually, they barely made eye contact since she was walking in front of him.

“Yeah, great, Robb, now people might think I’m stalking your sister” he thought. “Or dating?” That would sure bother her, she wouldn’t want to be seem next to him, a certified womanizer, right? But did it bother him? Should he have this kind of thought? Then Sansa spoke

“Theon. Ahm… I know it’s strange, but can I ask you something?”

“You already did, Sans” he replied with a smirk. People always said he smiled too much. A fake and shallow smile, his smirk

But she didn’t seem to notice. She just gave him a sad smile.

“I know… Can I ask you to take care of Robb?”

He looked at her a little confused

“I know it’s a strange request, it’s just… You’re his roommate and his best friend and… Robb seems to be working so hard these past couple weeks after our father died and… I’m just worried him…” she seemed to be talking more to herself than to him.

“Yeah, I know” Theon replied a little taken aback by her request

“I can’t check on him every time and I also think that bothers him, so… Could you do this for me?”

He replied quietly “Sure…”

She stopped and took his hands with both her hands “Thank you!”

Now that was unexpected. Her hands were warm and soft and she was… trusting him to do something?

People usually didn’t trust him. Sure Robb did, old Ned also did, but that was it. Even his own family didn’t trust him. He knew that. He knew how his father was bitter that, above all his sons, Theon would be his heir. He also knew that his uncle was thirsting over any failure, any wrong step he might take to throw him under the bus.

His colleagues and even some professors at university didn’t believe him. They thought he was only there because of his family’s connection and money, not because he was actually capable and smart. Sure Theon didn’t help himself by skipping classes and playing around too much.

Did Theon somehow started to believe in these people along the way?

“Also thank you for accompanying me to my dorm” Sansa said softly.

They arrived at her dorm. Shit, that was fast. Suppose he wouldn’t mind if it took a little longer.


	5. Chapter 5

After that Theon didn’t have the opportunity to talk to Sansa again. Or should he say he didn’t talk to her at all.

Robb graduated in a hush, no fancy party, just his family there and they all (except for Jon and Arya) having dinner together at a simple restaurant. Then, he moved to the north, to be in Stark Industries headquarters.

Theon noticed that in Robb’s graduation Bran looked more depressed and aloof. A couple years ago, he had suffered and accident while hiking alone in their property that made his paraplegic. So now, Bran was stuck in a wheelchair. It was a while before the Ponzi scheme scandal and their father’s death. It was a lot to swallow.

He remembered that on the day of Bran’s accident Sansa cried a lot. She never once left the hospital until his surgery ended and she stood with him most of the time until he could go back home.

He remembered on day he was the hospital as well and he heard Sansa saying to Ned “I dreamed of Bran. He was smiling.” and Ned gave her a hug.

Bran had a hard time adjusting to his wheelchair. But he had many friends at school. He was a sweet child and everyone liked him. Quick to laugh, easy to love. Now, he most likely almost never left home.

He and Rickon were being homeschooled and Theon bet he wasn’t adapting well with it and not being around his friends. That was what Catelyn, their mother, had decided. Being at home would be lonely, but it would be safer than having to face others thinking that their father was a criminal.

Sansa spend the whole graduation dinner next to him, talking and trying to cheer him up. They were very close. He bet they were missing each other’s company.

He was missing Robb’s company. Although they had a very bad fight right before he left. Theon remembered

“So, you’re ready to boot some people off?” Theon said in a joking tone

“I’m not gonna do that Theon.”

“Robb, it’s no time to be soft. You have to do that. It’s the only way to save the company.” Now he said it more seriously.

“I will find another way. Without having to sacrifice my people.”

“You’re making a bad call, man.” Theon said again in a joking tone

“Yeah. It’s my call to make. Not yours.” Robb said annoyed. “It’s my family’s future, not yours.”

That offended Theon. He always thought about the Starks as if they were his family. He was giving Robb some advice because, even though jokingly, it was the best option. It was what he would do. And Robb not only rebuffed him, but made it clear he was not family. Never would be.

Their fight didn’t make it less strange not having Robb around. Thinking about it, Theon couldn’t think of a moment he didn’t have Robb around in his life. He hardly ever went to Pyke to be with his blood family and most of his holidays were with the Starks. So, yeah.

“Good thing is I can bring whoever I want to fuck in this room now” he said to himself.

As if he could care less. Having someone around him was just so easy. He always had many. He knew he was good-looking with his athletic figure and his nice cocky smile. It also helped that he was a Greyjoy and the rightful heir of the Iron Islands, an international transport company. Yeah, he had money.

But how many of those people would still be around him if he lost everything, even himself? How many would help him? He didn’t know it back then, now he did.

It turns out nobody can fill the gaps in your soul. You can try to use them to fill it as much as you want, at the end of the day your demons are still there and the emptiness won’t go away.

Theon lost track of how many girls he had slept with to try to forget things or try to fill an emptiness inside him that kept growing, constantly. It never worked. And it usually ended with some of them heartbroken.

Not that he cared about them. Any of them. They were just a way of filling his time and giving him some pleasure. Should he care? They must know it was all about sex and a one time thing. Nobody was a child anymore, it was no fairytale, this is how things work in the world.

“This is how things work in the world” that’s something his father would say. Ruthless and pragmatic. To him, people were disposable, they should be to Theon as well. After all, Theon was his son.

Fairytales reminded him of Sansa. When he caught his eye on her, she was always alone on campus. Walking alone to classes or having lunch alone in the cafeteria. He wondered if he should talk to her, ask her how was she doing. That’s such an stupid question, she looked sad. Still, he should.

But he didn’t have the courage and kept postponing. _“Robb must have told her about our fight, about what I said.”_ Was his thought.

That was his first mistake.

The second mistake was allowing himself to be introduced to Ramsay Bolton.

Ramsay was a nobody in their social circles, so before that, he never even heard of him.

Theon was bored and kept complaining to a friend that drinking and picking up girls no longer gave his the hush he wanted to feel. It was just so predictable and easy and overall boring.

This friend said he knew someone who had a thing that could fix it. Gave him the hush he wanted.

That’s how he met Ramsay. When Theon realized he was always around Ramsay.

Ramsay that kept feeding his ego telling him how great he was, how powerful he would be once he became the owner of the Iron Islands, how he could do anything, at the same time that he kept feeding his addiction do cocaine.

Then, cocaine was all he could thing about. He was spending way too much money on this. On this and on living the crazy destructive lifestyle that Ramsay was encouraging him to: the nonstop crazy parties, the drinks, the drugs. This went on for months.

He didn’t think about his friends, his family, even himself. All he could thing was when he was gonna get the next fix and the hush and the good feelings. He wasn’t feeding well, he wasn’t bathing.

Then Ramsay started being cruel to him. Started calling him “reek” and treating him as if he was a pet, not a person. Theon didn’t care, because it was Ramsay that would give him his fix. And that was all he could think about. At the same time he started being afraid of Ramsay.

“Would you be disappointed with me? Any more than you already are?”

That was something that crossed his mind some times. Who would be disappointed with him? His father? Robb? Ned? Or… This thought has to go away. He needed another fix.

The thing was that Theon’s money ended. And he had nobody to turn to. He could ask his father, but that would most likely open the door for his uncle to try to destroy him. No. The Starks. No. He had a fight with Robb, plus he could never ask them for this. Was there any other person in the world he could turn to? No. As sad as it was, no.

Theon could be surrounded by many people, but when it came to the people he could really trust and rely on there was just one name in his mind: the Starks. But he couldn’t ask them for help now. It would be too humiliating. He didn’t want them to see him like this. Yes, he was in a bad place. He could see that now.

He couldn’t pay his debt to Ramsay. That made him incredibly mad. He started screaming at him, punched him. Told the others to punch him.

Theon was so tired. Tired of being so useless. Tired of always making the wrong choices. Tired of his life. He wouldn’t mind if it just ended. While people he never met were beating him that was what he thought.

He blanked out.

The next thing he knew he was in a hospital with Sansa on his bedside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this chapter hurt in many levels because I hate hurting them, but there it goes


	6. What happened

Sansa came to visit him every day. In the first days he thought it was ok. She was doing it out of courtesy. She came and told news about they day or about her brothers back in Winterfell.

Having her company was so good, even though he knew he should not feel this. She shouldn’t be around him.

She didn’t ask him how he ended up there. Although she knew about the cocaine. Even so, he was dreading for this moment.

In the 5th day Theon decided he should say something.

“Sansa, you shouldn’t be here… I mean, don’t you have other things, _better_ things to do than staying here with me?”

Sansa looked at him a little surprised but then she just smiled at him sadly.

“Honestly, not really. It’s not like I have many things to do or friends to be with at uni”

Theon was taken aback by her sincerity. Old Sansa would blush and say something like “There is no such thing. But if it bothers you, I will leave then” or whatever.

Sansa was also surprised she could be this direct, but that was the truth. She had nowhere else to be and, somehow, Theon was the closest to home she had now. She would take it.

“Uhm, how about that friend of yours. Childhood friend. Jenny?”

“Jeyne?” Sansa thought Jeyne would be sad that Theon didn’t get her name right. Sansa knew that she fancied him. On many opportunities, she told Sansa she thought he was handsome and would like to go out with him if he asked her to.

“But Jeyne, Theon flirts with everyone!” Sansa told her on one occasion

“I know! Then why doesn’t he flirt with me? I wouldn’t mind!” Jeyne said playfully. She was pretty with her dark hair and sweet eyes.

“You deserve better than a boy who just wants a one night stand!” Sansa said. Jeyne didn’t reply, she just laughed.

“Jeyne is working 2 jobs to support herself at uni… But she messages me a lot during the breaks” Sansa replied to Theon

Having to work in many part-time jobs, that was something most people would have to do to be able to study at an expensive elite private university. That was also something that neither him nor Sansa would know what it is considering they both came from very rich families.

“And… The Tyrell girl?”

“Margaery. Yes, she is my friend. But… it’s complicated”

“You can try me…” he said, he didn’t looked her in the eye, though.

“So, you know that Margaery’s father is a senator.”

“Yeah” Theon said as if he couldn’t care less

“Her brother, Loras, was just elected deputy.”

“Yeah” he muttered. He didn’t like Loras. He always thought that he would end up dating Sansa, because Margaery would do the presentations. Also, he knew Sansa though Loras was charming. Argh. Why did he have to think of that now?

“Her whole family is into politics and Margaery wants to enter it as well. So it’s important she has a good relation with everyone. And it’s complicated when she has to call people out every time because they are being rude to me.”

“Oh” he forgot about that. About how people suddenly became rude and cold towards the Starks after the scandal with the Ponzi scheme. “Sorry about that Sansa.”

“It’s fine, it’s just… I didn’t want to stand up for myself, I was so tired, you know? So Margaery had to end up doing this for me and I felt bad about it. She has a lot of friends. Like A LOT. So I figured she wouldn’t miss me if I didn’t stick around much.”

“Did she?”

Sansa laughed “Yes! She was so mad at me. But she understood that it would be better for me, because some of the people she hangs out with are just mean. We talk through messages all the time and we do sleepovers when we can”

“You could make new friends, you’re nice…” well, he shouldn’t have said that. It was awkward.

“Thanks” she smiled. That reassured him. She didn’t think he was weird. “It’s just… It became complicated after what happened”

“What? About your father and the Ponzi scheme?” Theon said in disbelief. Honestly, how much more would the Starks be punished for that?

“Yeah, that and… you know I dated Joffrey, right?”

“No…” Theon replied. His heart dropped. Joffrey? Little mr. perfect prince Joffrey. That’s was shit.

“Yeah, that didn’t help me either...”

“Are you still together?” he asked, but he was afraid of the answer.

“Oh God, no.” Sansa replied quickly.

Theon was confused because at first thought Joffrey would positively be the kind of guy Sansa would date. And should date. Joffrey was rich, pretty and popular, the whole pack, right?

But she rebuffed that though?

“I will tell you everything… But another day, ok?” Sansa said quickly hoping he would let go. Theon wouldn’t let go, he would just mock her.

Instead, he just said.

“Ok. Whenever you’re ready” he said sincerely.

That was unexpected. And very mature of him. But she wondered if this meant that he was also not ready to tell her about what happened to him.

She noticed he rarely looked at her in the eye. He was always looking down, on his hands or at the floor, never to her.

“What happened to you, Theon?” that was all she could think about.


	7. I wanna tell you

It was the second week Sansa came to visit Theon in the hospital. She came every day. At least he wasn’t complaining like he did in the first week. But she took it more as if he was a bit embarrassed to have someone visiting him than that she was somehow bothering him.

She could see that he was better. His wounds were healing and he was gaining some weight. The nurse said that if she wanted she could bring him some food. So she was bringing him some fries and soda. Yes, the nurse did gave her a reprimanding look, but she didn’t mind because she knew Theon would like that.

They were eating and talking banalities. Actually, Sansa did most of the talking, Theon was listening. He liked to hear her talk.

Then she took a deep breath.

“I wanna tell you.” she said tucking her red hair behind her ears.

“What?”

“About what happened between me and Joffrey.” She paused “If you want to hear it, of course”

“No, I want to…” he could sense that it was something important to her. Something that she had been building up the courage to tell him. Her hands were shaking a little. Theon wanted to take them, but… could he?

“After Robb left I felt really alone. Many people I thought were my friends turned their back on me, so you can imagine that I was swoon away when, one day, Joffrey asked me after class if I wanted to come to a party. I was insecure to go. I mean I would be alone and… people were not being very nice to me after the accusations against father.

But I went anyways. Joffrey was there and he welcomed me and he was just so… Nice and charming and he made me feel so special. He kept saying that I was pretty and he liked my smile. It seemed like the love stories and fairytales I used to read all the time. Next thing I knew I was his girlfriend and everyone started treating me nice.

Then, I started to get to know him better… he was not a nice person.”

Sansa paused. She looked at her hands nervous. Then she looked at Theon. He didn’t say anything, he wasn’t looking at her, but strangely she felt like she could trust him, so she continued

“He started saying that people were just being nice to me because he told them to. That they were fake and deceitful, especially the girls, and I shouldn’t trust them. It made me feel alone and paranoiac. Every time someone complimented my outfit or my hair I immediately thought that it was not true, that they thought I was ugly and they hated me.

Then Joffrey would say how lucky I was to be with him. That he would protect me from them. From everyone. And I started feeling like he was everything I had. That I was nobody without him.

Even when he started to criticize me. He said bad things about the way I dressed, said that I had gained weight and it made me look bad and that I was annoying…”

Sansa felt her eyes getting wet. She thought it was all in the past, but speaking about these things hurt. At the same time, she felt like once she was telling her story, she was letting it go.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to cry.” She said embarrassed

“It’s ok, I won’t judge you.” he said softly. She wouldn’t expect him to talk to her like that. Without the joking arrogant tone. He was being gentle. Was this how he really was?

Yes, she was glad she was telling it to Theon. She continued

“The worst thing was that I believed him. I thought I was ugly and annoying and that nobody would ever love me. He would say these things and treat me badly, but in the next moment, he would say that he was sorry, that he loved me and he would give me flowers or presents…

Then one day he was so angry. He had a terrible fight with his father and I was trying to calm him down, but he screamed at me and pushed me against a wall. He raised his hand and I swear he would hit me. I closed my eyes but then I though “This is not what my father would want for me. I’m a Stark. I can be brave.” Then I opened my eyes and looked him straight in the eye and said

“Hit me. Do it, but do it to kill me, otherwise I’m gonna put you in jail for this.”

And he was taken aback. He started crying and said he was sorry and that he would never hurt me because he loved me. And at that time, I finally didn’t believe a word he said. I told him

“I’m leaving. We’re done. Don’t ever talk to me. Ever again.”

He called me many times, but I didn’t answer. it was difficult, part of me wanted to answer the call. Eventually I think he got tired. But that didn’t stop him from telling everyone that we broke up because I was crazy and overdramatic about everything…

I thought all the time “How could I let this go on for so long? I was so stupid and weak...”

She looked a little hopeless. Then Theon said:

“You’re not stupid, or weak. I think you were very brave to end it. Nobody thinks that the person you care about - and you think they care about you in return - might end up hurting you…”

His eyes were sad. His eyes didn’t pity her, nor reprimanded her. He was just sad something like that happened to her.

“Thanks Theon” she smiled a little

“He’s a fucking idiot” he said. His voice was stronger than it had been in the past couple days they talked.

“Yeah, right?” she laughed a little

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.” he said quietly

“It’s ok, I don’t think you, or anyone could have done anything, I was very blind” she paused. “Can I ask you not to tell Robb about it? He would feel guilty for not been around and… as I said I don’t think anyone could have done anything…”

“Of course. I won’t tell Robb” He paused “Sansa, I’m glad you told me that, but-” he didn’t said. But he wanted to know why did she tell him that. Something she wouldn’t even tell her brother about.

Sansa didn’t know that either. She just felt like she could tell him, that he would understand her. He wouldn’t judge her and…

“Yeah, I don’t know…” she smiled “I guess I just trust you”

There it was again. That warm feeling inside his heart.


	8. More than I already have

His third week in the hospital was starting. Theon was feeling much better now. His body wasn’t aching all the time anymore and food started to taste something. He wouldn’t lie, the abstinence was hard. Sometimes, he really felt like doing it just a little. But he know he couldn’t. He promised himself that.

_“That can never happen again”_

That thought kept him stronger. And having Sansa around also helped him. It felt like home. Home? Or was it something more…

He was thinking about that while she went out for a moment to grab a coffee. Then he heard this voice. This voice that gave him a chill in the spine.

“Reek. It’s good to see that you’re alright”

A tall thin man with dark dry hair was standing in his door. He had a sarcastic smile on his lips and bloodshot cold eyes. Eyes that he laid on Theon. It was Ramsay Bolton. He continued.

“You never replied any of my messages or calls. I thought you were dead. That would make me sad” He said with no emotion

Theon was paralyzed. He couldn’t say anything, he was just staring at Ramsay not believing he was there. He knew Ramsay wouldn’t forget about him, but he didn’t think he would appear in his life so soon. He was not ready.

“Thought you would need a fix. That’s why I’m here.” He had a little pack of cocaine in his fingers. He entered the room and came closer to Theon “Am I not a good friend?” he laughed.

Theon didn’t say anything

“Answer me!” Ramsay said a little savagely.

“Who are you? What’s going on?” it was Sansa standing in the door. Holding a cup of coffee with both of her hands and looking surprised.

Ramsay turned to see her.

“Oh. He never told you about me?” he smiled sarcastically.

Sansa didn’t like him. She didn’t like him one bit. His voice was cold and he gave her a bad feeling. Especially when she looked at Theon’s eyes. They were terrified.

“No. Sorry. But you have to go now, you see, Theon needs to rest.” She said quickly.

Ramsay looked a little annoyed by that.

“And you are…?”

“I’m his…” Sansa paused. She couldn’t say she was his best friend’s sister. He would laugh at her and brush her off. No. “Fiancé.” She lied “I’m his fiancé, so, please, leave”

Ramsay looked surprised. He smiled.

“Reek never told me he had a fiancé.” He looked at Theon with anger “He’s is such an idiot, he should have told me! Better… He could have shared you with me…” he looked at her maliciously

Ramsay got closer to Sansa. She stepped back.

“That’s gross. And it’s never going to happen.” She said firmly and cold. “Please, leave now”

Ramsay looked at her with anger. Then he turned to Theon.

“Well, I think that’s something Reek has to decide, right? He’s a big boy, right?” he laughed. Neither Sansa or Theon moved. “Do you want me to leave, Reek?”

Theon was shaking. Ramsay scared him. Him as person, he things he did to Theon and as the fact that Ramsay knew what cocaine could do to him. He still craved for a fix. So much…

But he looked at Sansa. She was shaking as well. She must be so scared. She was scared, he could see it in her eyes. He couldn’t do this to her… “ _This can never happen again”_

He had to do something. He had to say something.

“I-I want.” He stopped as if he was trying to find the strength to do it “I want you to leave Ramsay.”

Ramsay was angry now. He screamed

“What a bloody ungrateful son of a bitch you’re!!!” he looked at Sansa “He’s trying to play mr. good boy, but he’s scum!!! He will always be a scum!!! Fucking little junkie it’s what he is!!!”

“Please leave now or I’m gonna call the Police” Sansa said loudly and firmly.

That seemed to scare Ramsay.

“Ok, ok. Sorry, I’m leaving. But you will see. Sooner or later he’s gonna come find me.”

He left and the room was silent.

“You ok?” he asked her. His heartbeat was back to normal but his hands were still sweating.

“Yeah. You ok?” she asked back. She had slid into a chair, still shaking.

“Yeah…” he replied automatically. He continued “I’m sorry, Sansa.”

“It’s ok. It’s just… he’s a really scary person.”

“He is Ramsay Bolton” Theon replied with sorrow.

The name didn’t mean anything to her, so she still looked confused.

“T-There is something I need to tell you”

Then Theon told her everything. The whole story. And the reason why he ended up in the hospital in the first place.

He won’t lie he was terrified to tell Sansa that. He was afraid of what she would think of him. If he would disappoint her too much. More than he already had. But at this point, after what Ramsay said, he didn’t think there was much he could hide from her. It was better to come clean. As hurtful as it was for him to tell her that.

“That’s it Sansa. That’s how I ended up here and that’s the whole story.” He said. She was silent and looking down at her cup of coffee. “I disappointed you, didn’t I?”

Now that was a stupid question. Moreover, a question he was afraid of the answer. Because either he disappointed her, which was crap or he didn’t, which was also crap because it meant she never expected anything from him in the first place. Confusing.

When she listened to this she raised her head

“What? No, of course not.” She said surprised. Well that was his answer, she never expected anything from him. She continued “I think it was really hard for you, and painful and I think you were trying to fight this. I know you tried to fight this. I also know it’s difficult. Some things are just complicated and you can’t label people based on them… I-I just wish you didn’t have to go through this alone” there was sadness in her voice.

Theon’s shoulders that were so heavy suddenly felt much lighter by her words, but his heart was still heavy. Why? All he could say was

“Thank you, Sansa.”


	9. Iron Islands

At the end of the third week, Theon was good enough to start rehab. They chose a good and respected clinic nearby. There he would have all the professional assistance he would need.

The only bad thing was that he couldn’t see Sansa every day. Part of the treatment was learning to be able to stand alone. Having family and friends near is good and it helps, but it’s also important to know what to do when you’re by yourself. Theon knew that.

Sansa also knew that, but that didn’t stop her from feeling a strange whole in her chest when she couldn’t see him.

When did he became so important to her? What exactly made him so dear to her heart?

It was something she couldn’t tell. She knew him for a lifetime and yet every time she saw him now, she felt all of those strange new feelings…

After rehab ended and he was clean, he told her he was going to Pyke. She thought this was strange. Theon hated going to Pyke, he spent most of his holidays with her family so, why?

“There are things that I have to sort out and come clean and going to Pyke is the only way.”

She figured it had something to do with his family.

He would be far, but this time it was different because they talked through messages all the time. He always cared to let her know that he was ok.

Theon had been in Pyke for over 3 months and Sansa wondered if he would ever come back if it was not for Robb’s sudden engagement announce.

And now, they were side by side in his car, going to Winterfell.

They had been in silence for a while now when Sansa asked

“How are things in Pyke?”

“Ahm… they are good.” He paused “it’s complicated”

“Oh. I get it.” she replied. She thought he didn’t want to talk about it. His family overall was a complicated matter.

“it’s just… I went back to Pyke to say that I would renounce my part of the Iron islands and somehow it ended with me and my sister, Yara, together trying take the control of it from my father”

Sansa laughed

“What? Theon!”

“Yeah, I mean… I don’t know if I ever told you, but being the heir of the Iron Islands was burden to me. It had been for as long as I know myself.” He paused. His eyes still fixed on the road, even though there were barely any cars on it

“It was difficult for me trying to figure out what should I do, who should I be. Should I life my life to lead up to the expectations of what my father wanted me to be? Believe in what he said was right? Or should I believe in what I thought was right? Should I try to live it my way? Then, what way was that?”

He took a deep breath.

“My family is complicated. It’s difficult to read my father and my uncle, even my sister sometimes. It was difficult to read my brothers. What were they thinking, what were they feeling? My mother died a long time ago, so to me that was what it meant to have a family. You treat people in your life just like any financial transaction. Analyze the pros and cons of your actions and make the choice based on that. If it was a bad choice, you paid the price. _The iron price_.

That was until I met your family. Your huge and crazy family. The care and affection you hold for one another. That was news to me. Having someone like Ned to look up to was news to me.

What was torn inside me deepened even further, with so many questions about what was right, what was wrong.”

Sansa looked at him. She never realized that things she took for granted from her family, like the affection they had for each other, was something others would look up to. Yes, her family was somethings she should hold more carefully. She also realized that she had been looking at him for a while. The sun was setting and it was funny to see how that made his hair, that was dark, almost auburn red, just like hers.

He looked at her and smiled

“It was good being with your family.” He paused. “So after I was good, I took the longest car ride to get to Pyke and thought over everything I ever wanted to say to them, but never did. I would say now. I wanted to come clean. Renounce the heirship and make a fresh start – _and be someone deserving of you_ ” the last part he kept to himself. But he wouldn’t lie, that was one of his motives for doing so.

He wouldn’t tell Sansa that. He couldn’t.

His uncle was keen to point that out

“Why are you doing this Theon? Is it because you want to be a Stark now?” Euron, his uncle said in a mocking loud voice that showed no affection.

Theon replied in the same tone

“No. And if I would, it would be none of your business”

“Did you fell in love with pretty little Stark girl? The one with ginger hair? I heard she visited you a lot in the-”

“No” he cut Euron out, but his voice betrayed him

“Yes you have. This is foolishness and weakness! They are ruined in business. And even if they weren’t, do you think she would want you? I heard she is a doll, a princess and you? You’re nothing more than an idiot. And now that you gave up the iron islands a poor broke idiot.”

Balon, his own father laughed at him. It was hard to listen to that coming from his own family. But Theon wouldn’t back down now.

“Thought you always wanted me out of the game, Euron” he said coldly trying not to show he was in any way taken aback. “Now you have me out. And I can do whatever the fuck I want with my life, away from all of you.” he paused “I may be a poor broke idiot, as you said, but at least now I’m free.”

He could still recall the shock on the two old man’s faces. He bet they didn’t believe he could do that.

Theon looked at Sansa with the corner of his eye, sit next to him in his car, but quickly turned his full attention to the road.

“I told my father everything I wanted to say, I was ready to leave for good, but Yara crashed into the room saying that by birthright we owned part of the company. Our mother had left this for us. As well as a trust fund for our education. She said that father was a brave man, but a terrible CEO, he was ruining the company with bad decisions and we – she put me in that – would do everything we could to take him down.”

“She was badass” Sansa said with admiration

“Yeah, she was. You would like her” Theon smiled “She was being passionate about it, but I don’t think she realized that taking Balon out of the game would be so difficult. That’s what we’ve been working on the past couple months” he paused “Sorry for being away for too long”

He looked at her right in the eye. It was still hard for him, but he wanted her to know that he meant it. The problem was that she looked at him right back. Eyes are such a difficult thing to control because they don’t lie

“It’s okay. I’m glad you’re back”

Sansa’s eyes weren’t lying. One single bit.


	10. For the simple sake

“I think it’s better if we stop now, it’s getting dark…” Theon said after they drove in silence for a while.

“Yeah” Sansa replied, her eyes looking at the landscape in the dark.

“Do you want to grab something to eat first?”

“Sure” she smiled

They stopped at a road diner nearby. There was a motel just next to it, so it was very convenient.

They placed their orders and were siting now in front of one another. Theon was still uncomfortable to be around many people and to look others in the eye. It was a reminiscence of his time with Ramsay he was still struggling to let go completely. Sansa noticed that, _“He still must have many things he wants to figure it out inside”_ she thought. But changes take time

“Theon” Sansa said quietly, but he listened to her in spite of the noise around then and he looked at her “I wanted to tell you that I decided I will put my degree on hold for a while”

He looked surprised

“Why? I thought you really liked English literature”

“I do. It’s just…”

“Does it has something to do with people there and-?” Theon hesitated

“No. That’s because I wanted to help Robb with the company.” There it is. She said. She told Theon as if it was an easy choice for her. It wasn’t she had been very conflicted because she loved studying English literature and she was _good_ at it. Would she be good assisting her brother in the company? She knew nothing about Stark Industries. Never bothered to know. What if she was terrible? What if Robb though she was incompetent? What if she disappoints him? Him… Robb or her father? Had she disappointed her father too much?

She continued

“It was something that has been in my mind for a while. He needs help. I know he tried to pretend he’s so strong and self-sufficient, but he’s just a person. And I can be there. I’m just…” She paused

“What?” he asked softly looking her in the eye.

“I was afraid I would disappoint him.”

“Robb? I don’t think he would ever think that.”

“Yes, him and…” Sansa paused and her eyes watered “My father.”

“Sansa…” Theon didn’t know what to say, because he knew that Sansa and Ned had a fight right before he died. It was something she kept mumbling during his funeral. He remembered that.

“I think I disappointed him. And I never had the chance to apologize to him for the things I said because I was angry at him. He passed away without knowing that I loved him and admired him so much…”

“I’m sure he knows that.” He said sincerely “Even if at that time you couldn’t say, it was something that you always showed him. He knows.”

“Thank you, Theon.”

“You’re hard-working Sansa, I’m sure you’ll learn everything fast and Robb is lucky to have you by his side”

Theon smiled sincerely. He forgot when it was the last time he smiled sincerely. Back then, he smiled a lot. But it was his usual smirk full of arrogance. A smile that showed he didn’t care and it was not sincere. This was a sincere smile.

She smiled back.

“Thank you. I’m just sad I won’t be able to study all the romances I love so much” she said in a joking tone, but with a little bit of true in it. She was indeed sad that she was giving up that part of her life. But Robb did gave up his life for the company, it would only be fair if she did the same.

“But you don’t have to give up on them, Sansa.” Theon said worried. Yes, he noticed.

“Ahm… but I don’t see it any other way.” She said firmly. “Besides, fantasies won’t take us anywhere”

“You sounded like my father” Theon joked.

“I’m afraid he’s right on this…” she said. Theon noticed that her eyes were sad

Their food arrived. She ordered a sandwich, fries and juice while he got a burger, fries and a soda. They both thanked the attendant that gave them a warm smile in return thinking that were a very good-looking couple.

Theon shook his head

“He’s not right, Sansa. Yes, it’s important to be pragmatic, and pay attention to real life, but you don’t have to be like this all the time. I think there are things that are worth our attention and our time or ‘wasting’ our time for the simple sake that they make us happy. We are not machines, we’re just people”

“Theon is right” Sansa thought. She was angry at her naïve old self that led her into a place of abuse and suffering. Yes, she blamed herself for being so self-centered and inattentive to reality. With everything that changed in her life after her father passed away. With Joffrey. She wanted to rebuff all that.

That’s why she stopped wearing her dresses and only wore pants. Dresses reminded her of Joffrey and when he told her that girls should always be feminine and wear dresses. How she would spend hours dolling up just to make him happy – or just for him not to criticize her appearance. Was it out of love or was it out of fear?

This thought made her angry, made her hate everything about her old self.

But she never realized that on doing that she was also throwing away an important part of who she was. A good part of her.

And now that she was willing to give up her love for romances – that symbolized the old Sansa - for what she thought were her obligations as Stark – that symbolized the new Sansa. But the thing was that neither Robb or her father would want her to do that. They wouldn’t want her to turn into someone heartless.

“You’re right” she smiled in relief. “I won’t give up the things I love.” Theon understood her so much and so well. Then she joked “You sounded very wise”

“Well, I learned that in therapy.” He said sincerely

“I’m doing it, too.” She paused “It helps a lot, right?”

“Yeah, it’s helping me to understand myself better. It doesn’t solve all of your problems magically, it’s a work in progress constantly.” He paused “It’s the same with sobriety.” A shadow crossed his eyes. It was never easy to speak about this

“Theon, I think you’re doing good” she smiled and put her hand on his squeezing it. He thought her hands were so soft and warm and that he wanted time to stop for just a little while.

“Thanks. I will keep working hard on it. Always.” He replied.


	11. By the pool

They got separate rooms in the motel. Theon thought it would be more appropriate and she didn’t complain.

The room was good and clean, but it was cold. “It must be because we’re getting near the north” Sansa thought

The thing was she was tired, yet she couldn’t sleep. She got up from the bed, wrapped herself up in a cardigan and went to the window. From there he could she a man with short dark hair in a hoodie with his feet in the small pool from the motel. He was looking down at the water, so she couldn’t see his face, but Sansa knew who he was and decided to join him.

When she sat next to him he looked surprised, but then he asked her softly

“Can’t sleep as well?” Theon asked

“No… you too, right?”

“Yeah… I kept thinking about many things and decided I should just get up a little”

“You do like water…” Sansa said more to herself than to Theon. She remembered he liked to stay at their pool back home on the hot sunny days, he was always the last to leave it. And at the beach… it was strange but when he was at the beach, Sansa thought Theon was the happiest

“I calms me down…” he replied

“Do you think we can make a quick stop at the beach on the way home? I know we would have to make a detour, but it wouldn’t be much, right?” She said hopeful. As if he could deny anything to her.

“Of course.” He smiled. And continued “But wouldn’t your mother be upset? I think we would arrive pretty late, when it’s already dark” Catelyn was always a little suspicious of him, worried that he might be a bad influence on her children. He didn’t want to give her reasons to.

“No, I think if we arrive before dinner we will be fine!” she smiled

They were in silence for a while and felt a peacefulness feeling in their souls. It was good being around each other. It was Theon who broke the silence.

“Sansa. I went to see Ramsay.” He said.

The peacefulness had gone, she felt a chill in the spine and looked at him scared

“Why?” she asked quietly. She remembered that day Ramsay saying _“He’s gonna come find me”_

“I had a debt with him. I wanted to pay it and tell him that I was never coming back.”

Sansa let out a breath of relief.

“This is good.” she looked at him with enormous care. He deviated her look

“I won’t lie. I was scared. I didn’t know if I would be brave enough to do it… but I wanted to come clean, so I had to do it.” He paused and remembered how it was

He put all the money on a backpack and went there to Ramsay’s apartment, a place he had lived for so many weeks. Weeks that he didn’t want to remember.

“Ramsay. There it is. I’m paying you all that I owned you. All cash. Now, I’m leaving and I don’t want to see you ever again in my sight” he said firmly and cold. He still remembered that day in the hospital.

“Reek, reek, come on, now you’re offending me. We’re friends” he said with a smirk “Don’t you miss me? Don’t you miss _it_?”

“No.” he replied firmly

“The hush, the good feelings? All the wild parties we had together?” Ramsay teased. He knew how thin was the line to put yourself through sobriety and he was playing with Theon

“Not at all. I wanna come clean now.”

“Why? You can have a little taste. It’s on the house, Reek” he pushed a pack of cocaine near Theon.

“As I said. I don’t want it.” Theon pushed the pack away and turned to leave, but before that he said “And my name is Theon. Theon Greyjoy”

“You really are a snub. Play lord good boy all you want. I know you’re gonna come back. And you’re gonna bring me that pretty little ginger bride you got. Or… I’m gonna get her myself”

Yes, he got in his nerves.

“Stay the fuck away from her”

“Ohhhh did I hit a soft spot? Is it because of her that you’re playing lord good boy? Whatcha gonna do with me, huh?”

Theon looked ferocious as he approached Ramsay and took his shirt’s collar

“I’m gonna burry you. Don’t forget who I am. I once did, but never again.”

He let Ramsay go and he looked terrified at Theon. It was the first time he saw Ramsay for who he really was. Not a terrible monster that would always haunt Theon, but just a person. A miserable sadist that had fun diminishing others so that he could feel that he had any power.

Theon turned his back and left the apartment. One last time. For good.

-

Theon looked at Sansa, she was so close to him and yet… But she was there, right? And she understood him in a way he never thought someone could.

She had seen him at his worst, at his lowest and didn’t run away. She never turned her back on him, she stayed and helped him in every way she could. She _trusted_ him.

In return, she had his heart. She always had his heart.

He wondered if unconsciously every step he was taking to come clean was because he was thinking if in any way he would be more deserving to be by Sansa’s side. As a friend and as a… Could he be that? Could he even wish that?

“I’m good now. It felt like a huge relief. It was a demon I had and I could face it and didn’t loose.”

“I am really, really proud of you, Theon” she said and he trusted every world.

But Theon knew that he still had a long way to go.

_“A long way for me to deserve you.”_


	12. By the ocean, believe me on that

They woke up very early and set their things in the car quickly before ordering breakfast at the same diner they’ve eaten last night. They were served by the same attendant from last night that made a sweet comment on how good-looking they were. Sansa smiled shyly and thanked her.

But they were _indeed_ good-looking

She looked at Theon that was eating his waffles. He had gained most of the weight he lost and looked a lot healthier. Also, his beard was groomed and hair was short. The shortest Sansa had ever seen in the years she knew him and she thought it suited him very well. He was wearing a long sleeved black t-shirt that gave him a rockstar look.

It’s funny she would pay attention to looks because on that day specifically she felt like wearing a dress. It was a grey long dress with short sleeves. She hadn’t wore dresses for a long time, but she felt comfortable wearing them again. Because she was around Theon?

-

They arrived at the beach soon after. It was windy and the water was dark and cold, but stepping on the grainy sand they both felt a connection to the wild environment that as unwelcoming as it seemed, was welcoming then.

They sat side by side in the sand for while. Sansa pushed her legs closer and hugged them as she thought what the boy beside her meant to her. Theon.

They had known each other for a long time, yet for a long period of their lives they were strangers that barely knew each other. Then, suddenly, they knew everything about the other.

For a long time, she thought she would never want to be anyone, ever again. She wouldn’t let anyone get closer to her again, she would never fall for anyone ever again. For what? Only to get hurt like she was before. She didn’t want it.

It’s so scary to let people in your life. Let them know who you are for real. Let them know your flaws, you faults, your failures. Let someone break the exterior you put up for others in order to survive a world that’s not kind, and let them see the real you. What if they don’t like the real you? What will you have left?

But with Theon it wasn’t that way. They’ve seen each other for who they were.

After what happened with Joffrey, Sansa realized that for a long time, she tried to search her value in what others thought of her. She knew Theon did the same. They were two people that craved for external validation. But the thing is, we can only find our value in ourselves. She was trying to and she knew Theon was also trying

They have seen each other at their lowest and they still wanted to be around the other. They understood each other better than anyone. More than that, she loved him.

When did it start? She couldn’t say. What set this feeling in the first place? She couldn’t precise. She was feeling it before she even knew it had begun. What was that Jane Austen quote she loved so much?

Theon got up and broke her away from her thoughts.

“I’m gonna go near the ocean a little, ok?” he said and she just nodded.

He took his shirt off and put it around his neck as if it was a towel. Sansa could see the many scars that he still had from that day that most likely would stay with him for a while. Would they be forever? She wondered…

She also saw the huge kraken tattooed on his back. Robb told her that when Theon was around 12 his brothers took him to get it. They also had kraken tattoos on their backs. It was a family thing. The kraken, the symbol of the Greyjoy family on his back, as a constant reminder that he belonged to them, and it was marked on his skin.

Sansa thought how it was a cruel thing to do to a 12 year-old considering how big the tattoo was – it covered his whole back – and how scared he must have been…

When she was younger she never understood Theon. How he was never kind to her like her brothers and made fun of her because she was a bookworm or when he got a little older why he was sometimes so arrogant and indifferent to her...

She would never thought that she would get to know him so well and he would become so special to her. Theon was always so kind to her. He had a look that made her feel so safe. Had he always been like this, but he never showed? Why?

She saw him as he lowed to take a handful of water and poured it on his face, the salty water with a wish for it to take away the bad things. She noticed that the left side of his chest had a tattoo of a giant wolf.

She got up and sat next to him, so close to the sea.

“Theon, your new tattoo, it’s a wolf…”

He smiled a little embarrassed

“It means exactly what it is” he said casually.

Yes. He remembered the time Jon told him “You don’t have to choose. You’re a Greyjoy and you’re a Stark.” He said after he returned from his long travel, before moving north with his girlfriend. It was strange, Jon and Theon were never close. Theon’s fault because he always looked down on Jon for being an orphan.

But that day Jon was telling what he had seem and learned from his journey and Theon teased him. “Did you found what you were looking for? Heard you got yourself a _girlfriend_ ”

Jon replied serious

“Not really, not quite. Ygritte is someone special, but what I went looking for… I think it’s something you have to figure it out inside.”

Theon looked at him in disbelief. That was not the answer he was expecting.

“Whatever”

“I’m still trying to.” Jon replied

“Well, to me… I’m bound to the Greyjoy way of doing things. Always will be.” He said joking. The kraken tattoo would never let him forget. He belonged to his family.

“You don’t have to, if you don’t want to.”

“You mean that I can choose if I want to be a Greyjoy or a Stark, _like you_?” he said jokingly again. To be honest he was having fun at Jon’s expenses. He knew how Jon was conflicted of his place at the Stark family. But then, Jon replied calmly

“I won’t choose. I’m a Stark and I’m my father’s son, whoever he is. You, too. You don’t have to choose. You’re a Greyjoy and you’re a Stark.”

At the time he didn’t understood what Jon meant. But now he did. His time with the Stark family changed him. In many ways. This tattoo symbolized that.

Sansa smiled back at him. She was looking him straight in the eye. They were so close. Could they be closer? She wanted them to be closer. She wanted to be with Theon. She loved him.

The next thing Sansa knew was that she kissed him. And he reciprocated her kiss.

But in the next moment he parted their lips, but their foreheads were still together. He spoked quietly and softly

“Sansa, I’m sorry. I can’t…”

“W-What?” she said with a mix of surprise and sadness.

“I can’t. I don’t even know how to begin to tell you that I… I don’t deserve you and-“

And in that moment a strong wave came and pushed them down. It was as if the sea was punishing his words. Punishing him.

-

Theon put a towel on Sansa’s shoulders

“Sansa, I think it would be better if you change clothes, we still have some hours on the road and the north is cold…” he wasn’t looking her in the eye

“Yeah, I know” she muttered

“You can change in the car, I will go get us something hot to drink…”

“Theon. Why did you say that?”

“What?” he asked, but he knew to what she was referring to.

“That you don’t deserve me. Why do you think that? It’s not true!”

“Sansa. You’re… An incredible person. You’re smart and kind and good. I’m just a mess. I’m a screw up. I don’t even know what to do with my life.”

“What? You’re also smart and kind and good.” She said, she looked sad and it hurt him to see her like that. “You’re putting me in a pedestal… but you said it yourself, we’re just people… I’m also a mess. You know that.” She paused. “Better than anyone” she wanted to say, but instead she said. “What you’re saying doesn’t make sense!”

“You deserve someone good”

“You are good.”

He shook his head. She continued.

“You were brave. You faced difficult things, things you didn’t want to and you didn’t lose to them, remember? You’re trying the best you can to do things right!”

He hesitated for a moment but he decided he would tell her the trust “Sansa, I don’t want to be a burden to you. I can’t be what the person you always wanted to be with, the person you deserve to be with and-”

“Theon.” Sansa said. He looked at her. He was afraid to look at her and won’t be able to hold his feelings anymore. But he looked at her anyways. “You’re more than enough for me. You’ve always been.” She reached for his hands and squeezed it with both of her hands “You could have made bad calls and bad things happened to you, but that doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. You deserve to have other people loving you. Please believe me on that.”

She smiled sadly and let go of his hand as she prepared to get in the car.

They changed clothes and were warmer as he turned the heater on.

The journey to Winterfell wasn’t long, but it felt long.


	13. Winterfell

Winterfell. Theon thought it was an awkward name for a ranch. But old Ned thought it was funny considering they were northerners and the north was known for being cold. Ned used to say sometimes playing with his kids “winter is coming”.

It was a huge property with an equally large house. Theon had spent so many time there he even had his own room. Yes, Winterfell was also his home.

As soon as they arrived they were greeted by the dogs. They were 6 and they were all huge. Wolfdogs. They found then as puppies in the ranch, their mother had died and they decided to take care of them. Each one of the dogs belonged to one of the Stark siblings.

Sansa’s dog, Lady was the first to greet them warmly. Then there was Grey wind, Robb’s dog, Ghost, the albino one that belonged to Jon, Summer that belonged to Bran and Shaggydog that was Rickon’s. The only one that didn’t came much closer was Nymeria, Arya’s dog.

When they entered the house Catelyn, Sansa’s mother came to hug then. Asked if they had a safe trip. Catelyn looked skinnier and ever since Ned died, she lost the sparkle in her eye. Sansa remembered that before, a smile came so easily in her mother’s lips, but now she rarely smiled.

Catelyn didn’t have time to talk to them because the next thing they knew Rickon came running at them. Sansa picked him and took him off his feet to give him a big hug. She noticed that he had grown up and it was getting harder to lift him.

“Theon!” Rickon hugged him “Do you wanna play videogames?” he asked

“Sure!” Theon replied smiling

“I’ve been training a lot, so don’t be sad if you loose” Rickon said. Theon laughed.

And as Theon was following Rickon to his bedroom he saw Bran. Bran was skinnier and his face looked a little sulked. He was serious and he just said

“Theon, hi.” a little coldly.

“Bran” he said surprised “You ok?”

“As much as I can be” he replied.

“Come on, Theon” Rickon pushed him impatiently and he followed the little one

“Bran!” it was Sansa’s voice, she hugged her little brother

“Sansa” he replied softly

“I got you some new books that I think you’re gonna love”

“What are they about?”

They kept talking but Theon couldn’t hear anymore.

-

They were ready to have dinner when Robb arrived. The first thing Sansa noticed was that Robb’s face looked hard. There was not a trace of the usual softness in her brother’s face. He looked very tired and seemed to have aged at least 5 years in 1. He greeted everyone with a warm hug and sat at the table.

“There it is, he’s gonna make the official announce” Sansa thought. But her phone buzzed. It was Arya. She finally replied Sansa back. But her message gave her a chill in the spine.

_Arya: DON’T let Robb do anything. Give me 1 more day. I’m coming home tomorrow._

“Mother. Robb. Arya finally replied me. She said she is coming home tomorrow.”

“Oh thank God, I was so worried” Catelyn said in relief.

“Yes, she texted me too” Robb said. He gave Sansa an understanding look. Whatever it is that he was saying could wait one more day. “Can we eat? I’m starving and I haven’t been home for a long time” Robb smiled, but it was a sad smile.

-

After dinner they all went to the porch to be with the dogs. Grey wind seemed very happy to finally have Robb around and in return Robb was giving him lots of attention. Rickon wouldn’t stop running with Shaggydog. Lady was napping on Theon’s lap and Sansa was patting Summer that had her head on Sansa’s lap but was curled around Bran’s wheelchair.

When they were about to sleep Sansa said:

“Robb. I know you must be tired, but can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Of course, sure.” He replied calm

“Can we go to dad’s office?”

Robb sensed it must be important for her to ask that. He said

“Of course.” And let her lead the way.

They entered their father’s office. It was just as if he never left. Nothing had changed. All of his things where still there, his books, his notebooks, his pens, his sculptures and his favorite paintings. It was as if his presence was there.

“It had been a long time since I didn’t came into dad’s office” Sansa started

“Me too.” Robb said. He continued “It’s still hard to enter his office at the industries everyday”

Sansa looked at Robb. She felt pain. She knew that he was trying his best to be strong, but Robb was just a person, he was not a machine.

“Robb you shouldn’t have to go through this alone”

He took a deep breath

“It’s the only way Sansa” he paused “There are-“

“There are people who depend on us” she interrupted him with a firm tone. “Us, not you alone”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m going put uni on hold and I’m going help you at the Stark Industries” she said firmly. he just looked at her with no reaction. “I know I don’t have a formal degree, but I’m hard-working and I can learn things fast. I promise I won’t disappoint you.” she paused. “Also, when everything calms down I’ll honorably going to finish taking my degree”

Robb didn’t reply. He just looked at her. He couldn’t believe it was his sister Sansa that was saying those things. Sansa the immature airhead and self-centered little girl he remembered. When she was younger she didn’t care about Stark Industries, never bothered to know more about it. She changed. She seemed decided and strong and responsible.

“What do you say?” she said.

“It looks like you’ve planned everything” he smiled and hugged her “Are you sure about that?” he asked

“Absolutely” she replied firmly

“I’m going to need you so much, sis!” Robb broke down. His shoulders relaxed. He had been trying to be so strong and for such a long time, but he felt the weight, the loneliness, the doubts. Yes, he really needed help.

“I know. That’s what I’m going to be there for!” she paused. They parted ways. “Robb. Can I change your mind about the marriage?”

Robb looked sad

“Unfortunately, no.”

Then Sansa hugged him again. And she could swear a tear fell down Robb cheek.


	14. Yara

Theon wanted to talk to Sansa after that day at the beach. Ever since then they didn’t speak properly. But then, what would he say to her?

And now he was on a call with his sister. Yara was complaining again about his absence in such an important moment for them. They still had to negotiate some terms with many minor shareholders and associates. She complained that the lawyers were getting too much in the way. But the thing was, both of them were not on the same page on what could they compromise in order to take down Balon.

Theon could sense that she was loosing the little patient she had.

“Yeah, alright, just come back soon, ok? I can’t stand having to negotiate with another lawyer.” she said. Her voice was tired.

“I promise I will return soon, as soon as everything here is solved.” He replied.

“Great. Ok. See you then.”

“Yara. Wait” He paused and hesitated. “I wanted to ask you something…”

“What is it? I don’t have much time.”

Theon considered the possibility of talking to his sister about it for a long time, before that call. His sister was just a stranger to him, but they shared the same blood, they were working together in something important. They could try to get close, it didn’t mean that they would have to be strangers forever…

He needed to talk to someone. _Anyone_. He would take the chance. The worst that could happen is that she would mock him about it.

His old self would never do that. He would never allow the slightest possibility to feel diminished, especially by his family. But now, somehow he felt that talking to his sister about wouldn’t put him in such situation, but would rather show strength, that he was willing to change things. He did change. He would have the courage to do that.

“Do you think it’s ok to lean on someone you love in order to change?” he said quietly.

“What? Are you on drugs again?” she said annoyed

“No, I’m clean now” he replied firmly “Never mind.” He said quickly. Yes, that was a mistake.

“I suppose it’s not a problem. You just can’t lean on this person forever. You have to do things for yourself and by yourself as well.” She said quickly as well.

_“Was there an opening for a sincere conversation?”_ Theon though. He would take it.

“When I went back to Pyke and was about to renounce the Iron Islands I did it for myself, but I also did this because I wanted to be a better person… for someone.” Theon said hesitant.

Even on the phone he could tell that his sister rolled her eyes.

“I know.” She paused “The Stark girl”

“Yes.” His voice was trembling. Was it so obvious to everyone?

“Did you?”

“What?”

“Oh lord. Get her. Did you get the girl?” she asked annoyed

“No…”

“Great.” She said ironically

“I can’t. I don’t think I deserve her.” He said. His voice was heavy. He continued “I don’t know if I can make her happy and I don’t want to be a burden to her. She deserves someone not so fucked up as I am.” He blurted.

He was opening his heart to his sister. What would she do?

“This is lame.” She replied dry. Well that was his answer. But she continued. “Do you know how she feels about it?”

“I-I think she likes me…” he replied hesitantly. That day at the beach. The kiss, the way she looked at him. “ _You’re more than enough for me. You’ve always been.”_.

“Then what are you waiting for?” she said annoyed. “The girl you fucking adore likes you, what’s holding you back? An idiot idea that, just because you’re a mess you don’t deserve someone liking you?” she said

“I…”

“Just do something Theon. If you don’t, you will regret it. Love and shit like that are not supposed to make sense. You just care about people and do the best you can to make them happy.”

“Yara, I-”

“You have you worth. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have stood up father by your side.” She said quietly. “I could see that you changed and changing is not a thing a coward would do.”

Theon didn’t know what to say. It was strange that Sansa, Robb and even Yara trusted him to do things. Why couldn’t he believe himself as well? People tell you all the time you have to believe yourself as if it was a mantra and it was a natural thing to do. To some people it might be, but for some… it’s a struggle. No one tells you about that. And Theon has been struggling with that, for a long time, even before Ramsay.

To find his worth. To be enough. To feel like he was enough.

He knew now that there were people who loved him. People who cared about him. That gave him strength.

“But turning you back on things you should do and running away from your feelings is something a coward would do.” She completed

“I know.”

“Then why are you asking me that?” she said annoyed

“Thank you, sister.” He replied, with a smile on his lips.

“Yeah, alright.”

And she hung up.


	15. Dodgeball

When Sansa came to their dining room she saw that Robb had already packed his backpack. He was having coffee at the table alone and looking some things in his laptop when she asked:

“You’re already leaving?”

“No. Only after lunch. Arya said she would come, right?”

“I thought we could stay here longer” she sounded sad.

Robb remembered Sansa had pledged she would help him at the industries, so if he was going it meant that she also had to go.

“It’s an hour away from home” he said softly and she smiled.

Her phone buzzed. It was Arya.

_Arya: SANSA I NEED ONE MORE DAY. PLEASE._

She just showed it to Robb that looked annoyed.

“I have lots of things to do, this is not a game I’m playing”

“Robb, calm down. We can go to the industries, you can show me around and explain some of the work I will do and then we can come back home”

It was a good idea.

“I suppose it’s possible. I will ask my secretary to do it.”

“You’re the boss” she joked. She had an idea and continued “Can Bran come with us?”

“Sure” he replied mechanically

It ended with the whole pack going to the Industries. Rickon insisted he wanted to go as well, even though Robb said it would be work related. Bran was calm, but Rickon? He was wild and never stood quiet for a minute. So Theon had to go as well because someone had to be watching Rickon.

They invited their mother to go, but she decided she would rather stay home. It would be safer.

Robb’s secretary was a pretty woman with long brown hair, she was very sweet and showed them around well. Sansa noticed that Bran’s eyes sparked for a moment on knowing more about the industries especially the creative department. She was so glad he was with them. “Bran is also going to work here” she thought.

Robb’s secretary also explained roughly what Robb did. He did _a lot_ of things. Not only the main strategical decisions, but also minor analysis and reports passed throw him.

Sansa knew it would be difficult, but she was confident she could help her brother.

-

At night Sansa, Rickon and Bran went to watch a movie on Netflix and Theon and Robb stayed at the porch with the dogs drinking a beer and talking as they did so much in the past.

They started by telling some jokes. But Robb also told Theon about his worries with the industries, how demanding it was for him and also how uncertain he was about the marriage.

“It seems like I've won every battle, but I'm losing this war” he said

Theon just listened to him, let him put it all off his system without ever judging him.

“Theon, I’m sorry about the way I talked to you before I left uni.” Robb said sincerely “I know you meant well and you cared about my family.”

“No, Robb. I’m the one who should apologize. I was arrogant and insensitive back then. I treated the people that worked for you and with you as if they were disposable. I should have known that you would never think of them as such.”

Yes, for a long time Theon considered people to be disposable, after all, he was always easily surrounded by people. But only after hitting rock bottom he realized that by doing so, he people would also not care about him. It was the only the ones he truly held closely to his heart that offered him a hand when he needed. He didn’t want to have superficial relations anymore, he wanted this to change, so he had to change.

He was trying not to hide anymore. Hide behind his façade of arrogance and indifference. He was trying to be himself. Whoever he was, even if he showed weakness, even if he was terrified. He wanted to consider other people’s feelings.

Strangely, he felt like that the most when he was with Sansa. He was himself the most and also that was when he liked himself the most.

“It’s ok. We’re good now.” Robb smiled.

Then, it was Theon’s time to share with Robb what happened to him. From the reason he ended up in a hospital – a part he was most terrified of – because he would have to confess his addiction, until renouncing the Iron Islands and planning a coup with his sister. But Robb didn’t criticize him one bit.

But he left out a important part.

“Hell Theon, it was a heck of a year to you…” Robb said, he was still trying to process all. “But I’m glad everything is ok now.” He said giving him a comforting look

“Yeah, me too” Theon said without conviction and Robb noticed

“What? Did something else happen? Another thing?” He joked and took another sip on the beer.

“Robb... I-I love Sansa” he blurted out

Robb put the beer he was drinking down and replied very calm

“I know”

“What?” Theon was absolutely confused by his reaction “You’re not surprised or angry at me?”

Robb laughed, but his laugh was a little bitter.

“I knew it for a while. You’re too obvious.” He paused “Why do you think Arya hated you so much when she was a kid?”

Theon was still trying to process all and he didn’t replied. Robb continued.

“Do you remember when we played volleyball together and it seemed like you two were playing dodgeball?”

Theon remembered. It was Robb, Theon and Sansa versus Jon, Arya, Bran and Rickon. It was so fun.

“Arya used to pick up on Sansa a lot when they were little. One of her favorite things was throwing food at her. On volleyball Arya always tried to hit Sansa with the ball on purpose. But didn’t you notice that you always tried to defend Sansa or at least avenge her just a little trying to hit Arya with the ball on purpose?” Robb paused. “You never tried to sleep with Jeyne, even though she clearly fancied you – and you knew that – because she was Sansa’s _best_ friend.”

Theon’s eyes were wide open. How could he never realized that before? Robb continued.

“Too obvious.” He paused. He looked Theon in the eye. “Do you know how Sansa feels about you?”

“I-I think she likes me back.” He smiled. Robb didn’t. “Look, Robb I know I don’t deserve her, but I will work hard to be someone you would be proud to see by her side. I will do everything to make her happy.” his voice was firm.

Robb seemed as if he wasn’t expecting this. People seemed to be getting him off guard way too often these couple of days. To be honest, Robb always thought Theon would back down on this.

Yes, he knew that Theon liked Sansa, but he eventually thought Theon would meet another girl and just let go of this crush. This crush on his little sister! His naïve and beloved sister that he wanted to protect from all harm in the world.

Robb loved Theon, he was his brother. But he knew he was unstable on relationships and unreliable when it came to be open to love. He understood that Theon was like this partly because his family was fucked up, but still… Robb knew, for sure, that Sansa deserved someone good, she deserved true love. He was not sure Theon could give her that.

“Of all the people in the world, why Sansa?” Robb asked as if he was asking for himself.

“I don’t know. I’ve asked myself the same question a lot of times.” Theon muttered. He did. Even after everything happened. “I think at first it was admiration. Sansa is beautiful and she is kind and she is a dreamer who sees good in people. I was never like this. Also she was there for me when I needed a lot. But now, I think it’s understanding. I think she understands me better than anyone. And I understand her. I think we see each other for exactly who we are, without all the pretending we do for others and we accept each other for who we truly are.”

His thoughts ran back to that day at the beach _“You deserve to have other people loving you”_

Theon seemed changed. Robb could tell he was being honest from his heart. He was still worried but…

“Theon. You will have to promise me you will never hurt Sansa. She’s my little sister.” Robb completed a little hopeless “She’s everything to me” he got up from the bench and Theon didn’t have the time to answer him because Robb tapped Theon’s shoulders said. “I’m tired. I’m gonna sleep. And I don’t want to have this conversation anymore” and he left the porch.


	16. Revelations

They were about to have lunch when they heard dog barks. Most precisely, they were Ghost’s barks. It meant that…. Could it be possible? Was Jon back?

While these thought ran, the door opened and 4 people entered the house: Jon, Ygritte, Arya and a tall man with thick brown hair, that they would later know, was Gendry.

They were all looking at them. Catelyn seemed the most shocked to see them. She muttered quietly

“Arya. Jon”

“Mother.” Arya replied respectfully. Sansa thought Arya looked ferociously. She had grown some centimeters since the last time they’ve seen each other, she seemed more muscular and her hair was shorter. Sansa thought it suited her.

But Arya didn’t hug anyone. Instead, she said.

“I’m here because we finally did it.” She paused as if trying to catch her breath “We found the evidence that can clear father’s name.”

Everyone was shocked. She continued

“That’s what we have been doing for the past year. We were investigating the Ponzi scheme and trying to find the evidence.” Arya was shaking. She did not usually shook. She was fierce and brave, but it had been so hard. She continued forcing her voice not to break down

“We found the company that covered the fraud. It was really hard to track it, because they had multiple offshores that lead to another offshores that lead nowhere. Many bank accounts that didn’t have an owner. But we found a lead on one of the offshores and followed it. At some point we manage to hack the system and found what we’ve been looking for… We did it.”

Jon was silent until now, but he could see that Arya wouldn’t be able to tell the whole story, so he continued.

“We gathered the information, cleared our tracks. Anything that could lead to us. We also made sure to secure the data in many servers across the word. So, there is now way it can be deleted.

The next step was to reveal it. Ygritte is an investigative reporter, but she couldn’t write it, since she is my girlfriend.”

“It would jeopardize the credibility” Ygritte complemented. She had red hair and a wild look on her face. Jon continued

“So we decided to contact one of her friends. She promised she would publish it. The whole story and finally clear out Ned’s name of all charges.”

“So you found out who was really behind the Ponzi scheme?” Robb asked. His voice was also shaking.

“Yes.” Arya replied “It was Cersei. She and her father Tywin were behind all of this.”

At that moment Catelyn fell down on a chair.

“Ned was right… He was right the whole time” she muttered

“And… When is it going to be published?” Sansa asked

“She’s about to publish in any minute… It will be a fucking blast.” Ygritte said with a smile on her face.

“We already reached out for our father’s lawyer, Brienne, and we told her everything about it. She said she would be ready and as soon as the story was published we will sent her anonymously all of the data that we found. Then she can petition to clear father’s name and stop freezing our family’s assets.”

Brienne of Tarth was one of the most honorable and correct people they all knew. Catelyn said that some people used to mock her because of her appearance. She was very tall and muscular and not at all feminine. That didn’t make her any less dutifully and competent, on the contrary, she was one of the best in her field. But people are always trying to diminish women and their accomplishments, especially if she did not fit their idea of how a woman should look or how she should behave. Brienne was fiercely loyal to the Stark family, they all trusted her with their lives.

There was silence in the room, until Arya said

“Father is finally gonna have the justice he deserved.”

And she was glad that in the next moment Sansa hugged her, because she felt her eyes getting wet. She didn’t want to cry. She didn’t want people to see her cry. So it was a good thing that Sansa crybaby was the one to hold her because with all of her sobbing, nobody would realize that Arya herself was also sobbing.


	17. A. Stark

It had not been easy for Arya to lose her father. Not just because it was her father, but because Ned was one of the few people in her family that understood her and respected her for who she was.

Arya was not what people expected her to be. They expected her to be feminine and quiet and dutiful. That was not her. She was a tomboy girl who spoke her mind and challenged tradition. She was not a girl who dreamed about finding a good match, getting married and having children. That was her sister Sansa, that loved beautiful dresses, parties and dreamed about romances with good-looking boys.

It was not a problem being like that. It was a problem to have people pushing you to be like that, even if it was not what you wanted to be. And making you feel bad and insufficient for not being what they expected you to be.

Arya wanted to explore the world, meet new people, learn different things. She was the happiest when she was beside her father seeing him work and when he explained to her about his job and their commitment to their workers. Their people. She loved visiting Stark Industries, talking to everyone, making new friends and getting to know their stories. They called her Arya underfoot, because she was a small ferocious thing back then.

But people wanted her to be a proper girly girl. _A lady_.

She always thought she was a misfit. Misfit in a school with the teachers constantly comparing her to her sister, that excelled in everything, while Arya only did good in mathematics and sociology.

Even on her looks. She didn’t care much on how she looked, but people didn’t let her forget about it, constantly comparing her to Sansa, that was beautiful. One day she overheard Sansa’s friend Jeyne saying that Arya was ugly and she couldn’t believe Arya was part of the Stark family, considering they were all good-looking and Arya had a horse-face. At the time, that made her cry.

It also made her hate her sister and constantly try to take back on her by throwing some food at her or annoying her.

Yes, Sansa could have made her life easier if she annoyingly didn’t want to be good at everything – even if for her, it came naturally. But at the time, Sansa was very self-centered and only though on how something she did would look good for her, even if it meant that she had to go over Arya. She never once though about Arya’s feelings.

Arya didn’t realize that Sansa was putting a façade and she was also lonely. But they sorted part of their differences later, when Sansa left for uni. Sansa would be far, after all and Arya would miss her.

Arya was about to start uni too if her father didn’t die. If they didn’t kill him! How do you think he felt being treated as a criminal? That broke his heart. They were going to arrest him! That’s what must have set the heart attack. She was gonna get him avenged.

That’s why she went to the north to find her brother Jon.

He was not her brother. On paper, he was his cousin, but in their hearts they were siblings.

Jon was Arya’s person. His _needle_. The person who understood her the most. And she understood him back. They always made each other smile and they were constant reminded on how much they looked alike. They looked like Starks, like Ned, with their dark hair and grey eyes. So different from her siblings that all looked like their mother, with their auburn hair and blue eyes.

So yeah, Jon wanted her, even if no one else would. He though she was enough even if no one else though.

Two misfits. Two people trying to find their place in the world. A place they can be accepted for who they were.

It seemed like Jon had found his place by Ygritte’s side.

They welcomed Arya and made the best to make her feel like home. Tried to ease her anger and dissuade her thirst for revenge. But Arya knew Jon wanted to avenge Ned too. She knew that he was like a father to him. He understood what she felt better than anyone.

Ygritte also understood. After all, she was a wild soul. She taught Arya some of her skills as an investigative reporter and as an amateur hacker. Arya excelled her at both. She researched about it extensively and spent all of her time trying to improve her skills, but most of all, she was obstinate. She would find the truth and clear her father’s name.

Jon hesitated at first because he didn’t want Arya to be this ruthless, but he understood her and, most of all, he tried to keep her human. He reminded her who she was. And it’s probably why she didn’t lose herself completely.

Although there was a moment she ran away from Jon and Ygritte’s home. Jon never told her family, because he knew he would get her into trouble and he tried to find her desperately.

She regretted doing this, but Jon had to understand how much it meant to her to do what she was doing. He was holding it back. Arya wanted to expose the truth, everything, everyone. Even if she had to compromise some things that Jon wasn’t willing to compromise

It was the time she worked as a bartender at night. When she met Gendry.

That was one of the most difficult times on her life. She was alone, she knew nobody, she was working at a place full of drunk horny men and she had to stand up for herself. She knew she could do that, but it didn’t make it less tiring for her to fight misogyny and patriarchy alone every single day.

Then there was Gendry. He was just a co-worker, but then he became a friend, someone she could talk to, someone she could trust.

He was a sculptor trying to make ends meet. He was an incredibly talented artist, Arya had seem some of his work. He worked with iron and his sculptures were just beautiful. But he had no name and therefore much of his work was criminally underappreciated.

Gendry was kind and he was fair and he never censored her for unladylike behavior. He was so unlike the self-centered boys she met in the parties she had to go with her family. Without even realizing she liked him. She didn’t even knew she could have feelings anymore, after all she had been through in the last couple months.

After shutting down all her emotions and replace them for anger and vengeance. 

But she felt. She liked spending time with him, talking to him, even laughing with him. He made her burden lighter and somehow she could feel that she made his burden lighter, too. Because Gendry also had his own demons.

She remembered one day that she had to do her hair, because the bar was celebrating its anniversary and the manager made her do that. Gendry said

“You look different now. Like a proper girl." He was joking at her. He knew how she was annoyed at people commenting on her looks.

"I look like an oak tree, with all these stupid acorns." She replied annoyed

"Nice, though. A nice oak tree.”

She felt a strange twist in her stomach back then. Gendry. She didn’t tell him at first who she was. But later she did. At first he mocked her for coming from a rich family. He kept calling her “m’lady” and saying things like “as m’lady commands” which annoyed the hell out of her. She was not a lady. She had never been a lady. She was Arya.

Then, she asked him out. And it shut him up.

And they were together and it was good.

She also had Hot Pie, the cooker in their shift. He was a good person, although quite naïve and constantly frustrated that people rarely ordered his food, but when they did, they usually ended up throw it up, because they were just drunk.

They were her friends. Her pack.

At that time, it was everything she had.

Then she found a lead that she needed to clear her father’s name. She reached out for Jon and Ygritte that were incredibly mad and worried about her, but welcomed her back and helped her dig deeper in the lead and find the evidence they needed.

And she did it. They did it. They brought justice to Ned Stark.

But now, she didn’t know who she was anymore. What would she do? What path should she follow? Who was her now that life toughened her and she had seen the worst of people? Could she go back to her old life? Should she try to find her own path? What was this path?


	18. Fire and blood

Jon was sitting in his bed alone in his room. He had just brought his and Ygritte’s backpacks from the motorcycle.

He hadn’t been there for a long time, yet it still felt like home. His drawings and paintings were all hang on the walls, along with his many arts supplies and CDs. There was a familiar smell and the same atmosphere. Nothing had changed.

It reminded him of his childhood with him playing with his siblings and the dogs, exploring the ranch, talking to Ned… He missed Ned.

But they did him right, didn’t they?

He remembered when Arya ran away and how desperate he and Ygritte were. He knew she would be fine, but still he felt guilty. He was indeed holding her back. But vengeance is not an easy path, he didn’t want Arya to loose herself in it.

Jon decided he wouldn’t go to university and take a formal degree. He liked to study and learn new things, he just didn’t like the idea of going to a place full of rich people who would look down on him because he was an orphan. They would. They always did that, his entire childhood.

He remembered one time Robb, Sansa and Theon got invited to a birthday party of some kid in their school, but Jon was not, even though they were all from the same school. Ned insisted he should go. But he didn’t want to. After all, they could have invited him, they just didn’t want to.

Also, when he graduated they would expect him to work at Stark Industries. But did he ever had a place in Stark Industries? Robb was supposed to be the CEO. Not him. That was what his aunt was afraid, right? That Jon would somehow steal what was from her children. He didn’t want people thinking this about him. He didn’t belong there.

Where did he belong? In the north? At Winterfell?

That’s why he traveled. He wanted to know different things, see different people, try to understand what makes you belong somewhere. Strangely, he found some of his answers inside himself, as he slowly accepted that external factors shouldn’t determine his worth as a person. Yes, he was an orphan, yes he knew very little about his origins, yes he struggled to find his place in the world. But, he had his worth.

It was strange for Jon to be back in Winterfell. Strange, but good. It was his home, after all. In spite of his gut feeling of always being a misfit, he felt different returning here and seeing his family again. Some things changed. Some feelings changed. He changed.

He didn’t noticed when Catelyn entered the room

“Jon” she said he looked at her in surprise. She noticed and said “I’m sorry, I knocked, but I don’t think you’ve heard”

Jon replied softly

“It’s not a problem, aunt.”

She smiled and said

“Thank you for everything that you’ve done”

Jon noticed how his aunt Catelyn had aged. Her hair and face lost some color and she looked so tiny.

“Not at all. It was my duty. Ned was like a father to me.”

“He considered you a son” she replied

Jon was taken aback. For a long time, he thought that his aunt hated this thought. That she wanted to make clear that Ned was his uncle, not his father. Catelyn continued

“I’m sorry I couldn’t be a mother to you. The way that you deserve it…”

Her words gave Jon a pain in the chest. He remembered how Catelyn was very polite and very gentle with him, but she was never really warm towards him, as a mother would be but. As she was with her kids.

But Jon was fine with it. His mother was Lyanna, after all. Even though he hardly knew anything about her. And he decided long ago that Ned would be his uncle/father since he also barely knew nothing about his biological father.

“Jon, I wanted to tell you this for a long time… I don’t know where to begin.” Catelyn was nervous, her hands were shaking. She continued “It’s about your mother and your father‘s story.” She paused. He had no reaction. “That is, if you want to know, of course.”

Jon wanted to know. He wanted to know this ever since he was a child. It had been a huge whole in his life that he never got over. When he was little he asked Ned about it a lot, but he never told much.

As he got older he stopped asking, because he didn’t want to be the orphan boy that everyone pitied anymore. The kid that had nobody to give the mother and father’s day cards they made in school, while it seemed like everyone else had.

He was surprised that it was his aunt, Catelyn, of all people in the world that would tell him that. But then, it was obvious she knew the whole story, she was married to his mother’s brother. He looked at her and said

“Yes, aunt. I would like to know that.”

“So, you must know that your mother, Lyanna, was an amazing woman. She was very different from me, but I loved her. She was so smart and adventurous. You won’t believe me, but she met your father at a rock concert.”

Jon’s eyes widened

“Yes, can you believe it? They both got the chance to go backstage and that’s how they met. Then, they went to the same after party together and there they could talk more and know each other. It was love at first sight. ‘The instant connection of two souls’ she said. But he was married and had 2 children. He told her that.

Even so, they kept talking a lot on the phone. I could see Lyanna was in love with him. It was hard for her, because she had principles and honor. She wouldn’t become a mistress or destroy a marriage.

And there was Robert Baratheon, Ned’s best friend that liked her so much. “It would’ve been so much easier if she just liked him back…” Ned said that, but he knew that it’s not how things work.

After they had been talking on the phone and giving each other looks at events for over 6 months Lyanna decided that she would end this for good. They agreed to do this in person and drove to meet halfway Winterfell and where he lived.

But instead of ending their relationship that was at that point only platonic, Lyanna got pregnant of you and your father decided he would file for divorce. When they finally clashed they couldn’t be apart from each other.

At that time it wouldn’t be acceptable to a woman of your mother’s status to be a single mother. And divorces were very complicated. Especially because of your father’s family.”

Jon felt a twist in his stomach. _“What about his father’s family?”_. Catelyn paused, she was taking courage.

“Your father was Rhaegar Targaryen.”

“ _A Targaryen_ ” Jon though, he knew the tragic story of the Targaryens. Everyone knew. He didn’t say anything. Catelyn continued

“At the time Rhaegar was married to Elia Martell. It was an arranged marriage to save the Targaryen’s business. It seemed like his father had lost much of his sanity and had been doing some very poor choices that made them loose a lot of money. It was also said that he had debts with the mafia.

The Martells were fine about the divorce, they just wanted Elia to go back home and rebuilt her life with their children. But Rhaegar’s father went insane. He said he would never forgive him for that.

It was a long and difficult process, but when it finally ended, both Elia and Rhaegar were relieved they could finally catch a plane and go – her to her home and him to see your mother. But there was an accident and both their planes fell and they all died, including their children who were with their mother.

Lyanna was devastated, she thought that the universe was punishing her for what she did and their deaths would be a burden she would have to carry for all her life. She became very depressed. That combined to her autoimmune disease were very bad, her immunity was too low.

After she gave birth to you she got an infection at the hospital and passed away. It was so quick.”

Catelyn let a tear fall down her cheek.

“Soon after she passed they discovered that Rhaegar’s and Ellia’s planes falling - that everyone thought it was an accident - was actually criminal. Someone had destroyed an important part of the engine in both their planes on purpose.

But they never found out who did it. Many people said it was Rheagar’s father himself that did it, but there was no proof. Others said it was the mafia, because they lost a lot of money with his divorce – since it impacted on the Targaryen’s business.

They could never find out because, as you know, they found Rheagar’s father dead with his throat slit. His other 2 children disappeared without a trace. It was the end of the Targaryens.”

Jon didn’t say anything, it was a lot to process. His aunt continued

“Ned never told you about your father not because he was not a good person. Rhaegar was a good man, Jon. He really loved your mother. I knew he was torn inside to have to leave his family, but he was trying to fight for his love. To make Lyanna happy.

Ned was sad because his beloved sister never had the chance to be happy as he wanted her to be. To know her son, to see you grow up and become such a great man.

And I… Jon, I never understood your mother. She and I were very different, and in so many ways. Deep down, there was a part of me that resented her for what she did. I wouldn’t go to that length to live a love. Against the society, against my family. I was so bound to duty.”

She paused and took a deep breath “Also I was angry at her for being depressed because Rhaegar had died. I always though of how she had people that loved her and cared about her. But I should have known better.

I only understood part of what Lyana felt when Ned died. When I found myself alone and somehow had to pick up what was left of me, because I had people that depended on me. It must have been very difficult for your mother. The decision she had to make out of love and alone... And for you.

That’s why I think I was never able to be a mother to you. I’m sorry.”

Jon muttered

“There is nothing to be sorry for, aunt Catelyn. Thank you for telling me that.” His eyes were watering.

“Jon, I’m also sorry if I ever made you feel unwelcomed here.” A tear feel down her cheek. “This is your home. We’re your family. Always will be.”

Catelyn gave him a hug and kissed him in the forehead, just like she did with her children. That she never did with Jon until now. And she left him alone to think.

He stayed there in the same position. He didn’t know for how long. He was trying to process everything. His origins and how it had always affected his identity. It had been a gap in his soul for so long and now that it finally was filled... He didn’t know what to do. What to feel.

Ygritte appeared at the door

“So that’s your idea of fun? Leaving me alone with your whole family? I’m not afraid of much, but that’s kind of terrifying, dude!” she complained

He didn’t reply now turned at the door to see her, he was just sitting in the side of his bed.

“Why are you all emo alone in a dark room?”

She entered the room and jumped in the bed so that her head landed just next to Jon. She said with a childish voice

“Save me, Jon”

Just then she noticed that his eyes were lost and wet. She sat next to him and put her head in his shoulder. He put his head on hers

“What happened?”

He didn’t reply and she realized that he wanted to stay in silence. So they just stayed there for a while.

Until he spoke and told her everything.


	19. Aftermath

“That was a heck of a day” Robb sat on the porch next to Sansa that was petting Lady. Grey wind approached him and Robb started petting him as well

“Yeah, I’m still trying to process everything...” Sansa replied distracted

“Can you believe that I got 5 proposals from old commercial partners to do business again? All in just one day. Minutes after the story was published” he said smiling

“That’s amazing Robb!” she smiled back

“But I’m not gonna give them an easy way. I sent it to our judicial consultants and asked them to make a though agreement, and if they want to break it, the fine will be enormous, they will go bankrupt.” Robb said serious.

“They deserve this. I didn’t expect less from you.” she replied and them joked “Young Wolf”

Robb laughed. That was what their father called him when he was a kid.

“Guess I can call off the wedding now?” he laughed and she laughed with him

“Thanks God!” she said

“But I’m much more positive about the future of Stark Industries”

“Me too…” she said

“Then, when everything calms down, you can become CEO and I can take some time off, do a marathon, watch some movies, maybe finally ask my secretary out for a date…” he said casually as he stretched his arms.

Sansa looked surprised

“What? Robb! This is inappropriate!”

“Not if I’m not her boss anymore” he joked.

“But how? When?” Sansa asked

“I don’t know… She was always around, with her sweet eyes and positive outlook on life, when I realized, I liked her. Wanted to go out with her, get to know her more.” He hesitated for a moment, but continued.

“All I could think of was the Industries and the job I had to do, the problems I had to solve, the things I had to negotiate, what I could compromise and what I couldn’t. I forgot about me, about the things I wanted to accomplish myself, my own dreams. It was strange, but… She reminded me I was a human.”

He shook his head. He looked at his sister that was looking at him with nothing but immense care. He continued

“I know it’s a strange thing to say, it doesn’t make sense, but the job made me loose a bit of humanity. She helped me find it.” He paused. “Her name is Talisa. She’s 5 years older than me and has a 3 year-old-child that she is raising alone.”

Sansa’s eyes widened. But not in a reprimanding way, she was just… surprised that her brother would like someone who was, in so many ways, so different than him.

“I think mother would be horrified.” he laughed, but it was a sad laugh

“She would understand.” Sansa said

“No, she wouldn’t.”

“I just think she always wanted you to date Margaery.” Sansa joked.

She remembered when they were both at uni when Robb said that he thought Margaery was pretty and witty and when Margaery told her she thought her brother was charming. Sansa would be the happiest if they got together and when she said that to her mother her eyes sparkled at the thought. “They would make a lovely couple.” Catelyn said.

“Yeah, anyone would want to date Margaery.” Robb smiled.

He remembered Margaery very well with her large brown eyes. He thought she was incredibly interesting and smart. They met at a party and talked the whole night. At the end, she suggested he called her for a date. But he never had the chance, because the next day his father’ name was involved in the Ponzi scheme and he passed away. Then Robb’s life was not his anymore. Margaery seemed from a very distant past now. So much had changed. Robb said to Sansa:

“The thing is, we can’t control who we like.” And he looked at her right in the eye. “Right?”

_“Does Robb know?”_ she thought.

“Theon likes you.” Robb said casually. And Sansa’s heart dropped and her thoughts ran to that day at the beach. “He said he couldn’t be with me” she thought, but didn’t say anything. Robb noticed the change on his sister’s face. He continued.

“And apparently you like him too.” He didn’t looked annoyed. He looked calm. “I won’t say anything. You’re grown up now. And much stronger than I thought you were. I just want what’s best for you, ok?”

“Robb.” She hesitated, but continued “You know, most of the time I just pretend to be someone I’m not. To like the things that I don’t really like or to say the things I’m supposed to say because I know that’s what people want to hear. Just because I want everyone to like me but… When I’m with Theon I feel like I can just be myself and that’s enough. I think that’s what you feel when you’re around Talisa, right?”

“I suppose…” Robb replied but she felt like his thoughts ran far away.

He clearly didn’t want to continue this conversation so he just got up and was about to leave, when Sansa said

“I also want what’s best for you.” She looked at him and then smiled “Ask her out, will you?”

Robb grinned

“We’ll see.”

And he left.


	20. She-wolf

Sansa was still on the porch when she looked afar and saw it was Arya and Gendry a couple meters away from her. Arya was sit and Gendry was standing. She thought it was funny because it made him look so much bigger than her. Arya was looking at Nymeria that was also looking at her but refused to come closer in spite of Arya’s pledges, maintaining a safe distance.

Sansa decided to approach and greeted them both with a “hey” and a smile. Gendry nodded and Arya just said

“She won’t come near me” frustrated.

“I will go inside” Gendry said calmly

“Oh, no please, I didn’t want to bother you” Sansa said. She wondered if she made Gendry unconformable

“Not at all.” He said “I just wondered you two must have a lot to catch up” he said calmly.

“We do…” Sansa said and looked sweetly at her little sister that just raised her eyebrow instead.

They sat next to each other.

“Arya, what you did was incredibly brave. I’m sure it wasn’t easy…”

“It was not, but it had to be done” she replied

“I always admired you for being brave and strong and determined.” Sansa looked at her with care

“Really?” Arya said in disbelief

“Why you say that?” Sansa asked surprised

“Sansa, you’re miss golden girl. Why would you admire me? Most people would say I’m just an ill-behaved child” she joked, but there was some truth beneath her words. Sansa knew that.

“That’s not true. I have so many flaws. Also, I admire you exactly for what I said. You’re the bravest person I know.” She paused “We’re different, but we care about each other the same”

“Yeah” Arya spoke softly

“I’m sorry I wasn’t a good big sister to you” Sansa said

“Yeah, you were not” Arya joked, but she continued “But you’re now. I admire you too, you know that? And I love you the same” she smiled looking at Sansa with care.

Arya didn’t want to talk about the time they were apart, so Sansa decided she would start. And she told her everything. About uni and friends and about Joffrey. The whole story. When she finished Arya said

“What a fucking asshole! If I ever see him again I’m gonna break all of his teeth”

That made Sansa laugh. Arya continued

“What? You doubt? I already did once to a person, I can do it twice!” she said ferociously

“I know you can. Thanks for caring about me”

“Did you tell anyone about that? Mother? Robb?” Arya asked

“No, I don’t think they would take well with everything that’s happening in their lives…” she paused “I just told Theon.”

“Theon? Theon Greyjoy?” Arya asked

“Yeah, why do you sound so surprised?”

“Nothing… I just never thought you guys were close.”

“A lot of things happened and we somehow got close. It’s strange Arya, I fell I’m myself the most when I’m around him…”

“NO WAY!” she said loudly

“What?”

“Do you… _like_ him?” Arya asked in disbelief. Sansa didn’t replied, but even in the dark Arya could tell her sister blushed “You do! Really Sansa, Theon Greyjoy? That guy that fucks pretty much anything that _moves_?” she said

That made Sansa laugh

“He has changed… A lot happened.” Sansa said, but her tone was a little sad

Arya noticed. Something important must have happened. But, after a moment, Arya laughed loudly

“What?” Sansa asked surprised at her reaction

“Nothing.” She continued “I just thought that you have a _really_ bad taste on man!”

Sansa punched her lightly and laughed as well. Arya continued

“But I don’t think I would ever find someone good enough for you” she said casually

“I can’t believe you _can_ be sweet!” Sansa joked and it was Arya’s time to punch her lightly.

Their laughs ended and after a moment in silence Sansa started

“So, about Gendry…”

“What about him?” Arya replied casually

“He is you boyfriend…”

Arya rolled her eyes and said:

“If you wanna call it that way…”

“Arya! I want the details! How did you two met and everything!”

Arya rolled her eyes again

“It’s nothing special… It’s no fairytale, Sansa”

“I still wanna know!” she paused. “If you wanna tell me.”

“Right. So while I was with Jon and Ygritte I worked as a bartender in the night shift.”

Sansa’s eyes widened

“Arya, that’s dangerous”

Her sister laughed at her reaction

“I’m not a little girl anymore. And if anyone acted inappropriate, the manager said I could just punch them in the face. So, yeah, nobody messed with me.”

That Sansa believed. She continued

“We worked in the same shift and that’s how we met. I asked him out one day and we’ve been hanging out together ever since. The sex is good.”

“Arya!”

Arya just laughed at her reaction. Sansa laughed with her as well. Arya had changed, but in her heart she was still the same.

“How was your first conversation?” Sansa asked

“Honestly you won’t let go, will you?” Arya said pretending to be annoyed, but she knew that is how her sister was.

“Nope” Sansa shook her head.

“Argh. So, it was about my second day in the job and there was this drunk guy that kept annoying me, asking me if I wanted to hang out with him. Gross. And I told him twice I was not interested. He was getting on my nerves and I swore the next time he talked to me I would punch him. But when he started Gendry cut the way and said

“Hey, man she already said she’s not into, leave her alone!”

I think it’s because Gendry is about twice my size, but the guy really chilled out and left”

“That was really sweet!’

“Are you kidding me? I got pissed off. Nobody fights my battles and I could handle an stupid ass drunk!”

Sansa thought “Typical Arya” and she said “I bet you told Gendry that”

Arya laughed

“Yes I did!”

“And…?”

“You know what he told me? He said: ‘I know you can, but he was doing something wrong and I wouldn’t just sit around and do nothing about it’”

Sansa smiled.

“That was _indeed_ really sweet.”

“Yeah…” Arya said softly. “I think that’s was pretty much that moment I thought I was fucked.”

They both laughed. Sansa said

“He seems like a really good guy.”

“He’s the best I’ve ever met” Arya replied. No sarcasm in her voice, just pure affection and respect for one person that clearly meant a lot to her.

“What are your plans now?” Sansa hesitated “Are you staying home?”

“I don’t think so, sis…” Arya paused “After what happened to father all I’ve ever wanted was to avenge him, clear his name, do him justice. And I got this. Now I feel a little empty and I don’t know what to do… I don’t think I can just stay here in Winterfell or go back to uni as if nothing ever happened.”

“I know.”

“There is this thing in my mind… That I always wanted but I was not sure if I could ever.” She seemed to let her thoughts loose and she said it more to herself than to Sansa “Now that my job is done, maybe I can try that…”

“What is it, Arya?”

“Taking a road trip, explore new places… Luckily with Gendry by my side. And Nymeria, if she wanted me” she said a little annoyed “Gendry’s dream was to do a road trip by motorcycle you know? Like ‘The Motorcycle Diaries’ thing?”

Sansa laughed

“I know! So he is a fan of Che?” said Sansa remembering that Arya had a poster of Che Guevara hang on her bedroom

“Yeah!” she replied annoyed

“Another thing you have in common!”

“But you did know that Che thought women were not as good fighters as men, right? So I kind of dropped him out after this. I told Gendry that and I’m almost convincing him to go with a Jeep. If Nymeria stops rejecting me like that!” She said the last part louder again, hoping that the dog would change her mind and get closer to her

“She is not rejecting you, she is just hurt she hasn’t seen you for a while.”

“Yeah, and is punishing me for that!” Arya rolled her eyes

“You just need a little push” Sansa showed her a pack of dog snacks she had been hiding and tossed it to Arya who smiled and raised her eyebrow

“That’s cheating!”

“No, it’s not. It’s called spoiling your dog”

And the two laughed. And as Arya offered her a snack, Nymeria finally approached her.


	21. Cannot fix

Theon wanted to talk to Sansa. But, so many things happened in the past couple days there were so many people around. The whole pack was there, also the many people coming to talk to the Starks about the news and apologize for their behavior.

He never got the chance. Or was he avoiding it? Either way he couldn’t run away anymore. He had to talk to her.

He went into her room’s direction hoping she would be alone there. As he approached it, he saw her. Sansa was sitting by her window with a notebook on her hands. She seemed like a painting with a long green dress. Theon guessed it was one of her quote-books where she wrote the extracts she loved the most from the books she read. He knocked at her open door lightly.

She looked at him and nodded, then turned her eyes back to the notebook. He entered her room and broke the silence

“Sansa…”

Then she interrupted him

“I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago…” she spoke softly and quietly

And he completed it

“I was in the middle before I knew that I had begun. Jane Austen”

Theon knew it only because he heard Sansa saying that quote before. And she telling many times how much she loved Jane Austen’s books.

Sansa closed her notebook.

“From Pride and Prejudice. It’s one of my favorite books ever.”

“I know” he smiled

She smiled back, but it was a sad smile. He continued

“You ok?” he asked softly

“Yeah. You?”

“I’m ok as well…”

“Good” she smiled

“Sansa, I want to tell you that…” he hesitated and looked at her. It gave him strength “I’m sorry for taking so long and sorry for the things I said that day at the beach. And… I love you.” his hands were shaking “I told you I don’t deserve you and I know that, but I realize that, even so, I can promise you I will work hard every single day to be someone worthy of you. I promise you I will do everything I can to make you the happiest.”

Sansa was taken aback by this. She wasn’t really hoping Theon would do anything after that day at the beach. At that time, she understood his feelings, she knew he had things he had to solve by himself and she didn’t want to push her feelings on him. She thought her feelings would be hopeless, but seeing him right now in front of her…

He continued

“I was trying to burry what I felt for so long, because of all my flaws and my insecurities… I didn’t think it was possible. I was sabotaging myself all along. Sabotaging the possibility of us. I’m not gonna hold back anymore, because all I ever want is to be by your side.” He paused and then completed “If you’ll have me.”

She came to him and hugged him. She didn’t think there was anything she could say. Then, after they parted, they looked at each other the in the eyes with immense care.

He kissed her and she reciprocated it. She could feel his arms around her waist and she also had hers around his neck. They both felt so safe and so happy. Sansa couldn’t tell for how long they stayed there, it was as if time had stopped for a while.

“Well… That’s _gross_.” Said a very familiar voice

Sansa laughed. Their lips parted but their foreheads were still together

“Arya! What do you want?”

“We’re leaving. Aren’t you gonna bid us farewell? Or…” she said teasingly “Do you prefer to continue to snog Greyjoy there?

Sansa rolled her eyes and smiled to Theon who smiled back. Not the cocky smile he used to have, but his sweet smile. She took his hand with both of her hands and they went to say goodbye to Arya, Gendry, Jon and Ygritte that were going back north.

Robb was also setting his car.

“Robb you’re going too?” Sansa asked

“I’m going to see Frey. Call off the wedding. It’s something I have to do myself and in person.” He said serious.

“Do you want us to go with you?” Theon asked

“Thanks man, but I think I have to do this alone.”

“No, Robb. I will go with you” said Catelyn firmly “It’s my duty as your mother.” Everyone was surprised and didn’t consider for a moment question her.

She got in his car and they both went to see Frey.


	22. A good man

Sansa was at Stark Industries analyzing some contracts and important reports and leaving some notes for Robb to give the final word. Although she guessed that he would agree with her.

This time she noticed Robb’s secretary, Talisa, looked a little taken aback, she didn’t have the sparkle in her eyes that she had when they first met. Could it be because…? That thought made Sansa smile and she made sure to casually drop the wedding was cancelled.

She could swear that Talisa smiled a little brighter after that.

Meanwhile Theon was at Winterfell. He was working, or trying to. There were many things he left unsolved at Pyke and now Yara was screaming at him on the phone because the negotiation was going bad and he promised it he would review some documents for her.

When he hung up the phone, Bran was next to him.

“Hi Bran” Theon said trying to hide that he was a little scared, because Bran appeared out of nowhere. He continued “So, did you like the books Sansa brought you, she said-“

“Theon, I’m not here for casual conversation.” Bran said coldly. “I just want to tell you that I have my eye on you.”

Theon was taken aback. What did that mean? It was not a surprise to him, he could feel that he wasn’t Bran’s favorite person, but… Theon remembered that Bran used to be very different when he was a kid, before the accident and Ned’s death. Bran was a sweet kid, now his face was a lot harder and sulkier.

Theon just replied

“It’s ok. I know I’m-.”

Bran seemed not to care of his answer. He didn’t care about Theon at all. When they were younger, he just thought that he was a little loud and annoying, even though he was funny.

Bran had been feeling for a while these feelings of sadness and loneliness that kept growing inside him and he didn’t know what to do. Some days he felt like he didn’t even want to wake up from his bed. He lost too much. He lost his legs, then he lost his father and his friends and now he was losing his sister…

Robb advised him many times to seek therapy and adequate medication, and he was doing it but still. There are days that you’re good and days that you’re bad. Days that you find strength to face things and days that your struggles seems too much to bare… He continued

“I know you made Sansa cry. She didn’t give much details, but that I know.”

Theon’s heart dropped

“Bran, I-“

He looked at Theon. He seemed hopeless and yet, changed. He was a different Theon, he could see in his eyes. If even Theon changed, could he also change?

Arya and Jon uncovered the truth about the scheme that unfairly involved their father. Things at Stark Industries seemed to be better, maybe he could help Robb and Sansa there? Maybe he could go back to school? Maybe he could talk to his friends again? Was there also hope for him?

Yes, Theon changed. He made Sansa sad, but he must have apologized and made emends for his behavior. Bran could also change. It would not be instantaneously, but at least he wouldn’t be stuck. He could try. After all, he was alive.

“But, apparently, you tried to fix it. And she seems happy. Sansa likes you and I respect her opinion.” He paused “So I believe that you are a good man.”

Bran turned his back and left. Yes. He would try. And although a little upset that Theon was dating his sister that he loved so much and was so close to, he understood Sansa as well. He respected her and most of all, he wanted her to be happy.

“A good man.” Yes, that was more than enough for Theon.

-

It was getting late and Robb and Catelyn still haven’t returned. Or called, or replied the messages. Everyone was starting to worry. After all, Walder Frey was considered to be a difficult man to deal with and most likely wouldn’t take the cancelation of the wedding very well.

_“Could he do something bad to Robb and mother?”_ was a though that crossed Sansa’s mind many times and she tried to shut it down.

But they arrived at Winterfell safe.

Two hours later than they planned. Both fine, but looking very tired.

“So… How was it?” Sansa asked hesitantly.

“I was bad. Frey was very angry at us, he screamed a lot at us…” Robb said

“But he eventually calmed down and came to his senses and said that he understood the decision.” Catelyn said firmly.

“Roslin said she said she was fine and she wasn’t offended.” Robb said.

They all knew it must have been hard for him, he was a rightful person, a good man, and he didn’t want to be the one to call off a wedding he had agreed to in the first place. Breaking his vow.

“She said she knew the implications of her position and never really hoped to find real love.” Robb continued

That made everyone in the room a little sad and in silence

“It’s good you have to opportunity to do so now, son.” Said Catelyn looking at Robb with immense care.

It had been a long time since Catelyn didn’t see Robb. He had been working so much, barely came back home. For a long time she couldn’t give him strength and offer him the advice she knew he needed, because she, herself, was trying to find strength and purpose after Ned passed away.

But now, she could. She would.

“I suppose I should have told her about Theon’s riot against Balon, in order to inspire her, but I thought it not appropriate for the moment” Robb joked and then he turned serious.

Robb realized that he couldn’t save everyone. He thought he could, or at least always tried to, but Roslin would still be forced upon marriage to someone she would most likely not love. Walder Frey was still angry at him. No matter how hard he tried to do things right, he would never please everyone, make everyone happy.

_“Why would someone want power not matter what? Sacrificing other people’s happiness…”_ he wondered.

He would never be like that. He understood that there were things that were not in his control and the only thing he could do was to try to do his best. What he thought was right, even if it wasn’t easy. To protect people who were dear to him. That’s a whole lot to do.

“It was not easy, but it had to be done” he said quietly as his mother hugged him.


	23. Ice and Fire

Arya said nothing big and nothing extravagant, just us, gathering together, as a family. Instead she got a full barbecue with lots of people. Although all of these people were sort of part of their family.

The Starks were very much loved. When Ned was alive he loved gathering their friends on parties and barbecues. After everything happened that was the first time they were doing this. Only this time they _indeed_ have only the ones that matter. Family and friends that stuck with them in their worst moments.

So yeah, it was big and it was a bit extravagant, but it was with family.

Arya and Gendry would be out for a year taking their very much planned road trip on a Jeep. Yes, they wouldn’t go on motorcycles and would take Nymeria. They would start their journey on Latin America and God knows where they would end it. They both needed this. And it was good they were doing this together.

Everyone would miss them, but they were, after a long time, happy. It was good to see that after everything they’ve been through the past few months, they were able to smile and find strength in company of one another

They could see Brienne grabbing a beer and trying to dodge Tormund – a very funny ginger friend of Jon and Ygritte from the north that, apparently, feel over the heels for her. Podrick, Brienne’s loyal paralegal, was having fun watching this. Also, they could see Maege Mormont with her little Lyanna, fearless she-bear that seemed to take a like on Jon.

Hot Pie was helping making the food and finally happy that people were actually enjoying his creations and not throwing them up. Margaery Tyrell and Loras, her brother, were also there talking cheerfully with Davos. Loras was with his boyfriend Renly. He finally found the courage to come out publically and although some of his conservative electorate criticized him, he got a lot of support from people he never expected to. Sam and Gilly were there happy and so in love. Jeyne and her family were there too.

Even Yara, Theon’s sister came. They finally took down Balon and now she was the CEO of the Iron Islands. In the end, they felt like Balon was more proud of what his children, especially his daughter, had done than upset he lost his position. Euron was furious, but they didn’t care about Euron.

Theon kept his word and renounced his share for his sister. He was no longer bound to the Iron Islands, although he really liked his sister, and assisted her in some minor things, since they got closer.

Bran was talking to his friends Meera and Jojen Reed. He seemed much happier to be around people, going back to his school and seeing the world outside the ranch. Although things wouldn’t change for him instantly, and his depression wouldn’t be magically cured, he felt much better and much confident about his future.

Catelyn was talking to Talisa and they seemed to be getting along very well. She brought her son that seemed to really like Robb.

It turned out Robb didn’t have to renounce being CEO to ask her out on a date, because Talisa quit her job the day he returned to Stark Industries. At first, he was shocked, but she told him that she got a really good proposal to work at Arryn Hotels and Resorts and she would have to work less hours, so she could take better care of her son and maybe start a language course that she wanted to do for a while.

Robb was devastated but he said he understood and would give her a good recommendation letter.

She said that she was also quitting because she had a serious crush on her boss and it was getting difficult to hide and act professionally. So, yeah, there was no way he wouldn’t ask her out after that.

As much as they both feared what Robb’s mother would say, she took it surprisingly well.

“I understand you reasons and I trust you, Robb. You’ve given too much for this family. I want you to be happy and live your life.” She completed. “This woman must’ve been very special in order to move your heart”

She was.

Sansa was sitting near the fire, since it was a very cold night. Would it snow? She was petting Lady and talking to Jon and Ygritte that were also petting Ghost, when Arya approached them

“I’m gonna miss you.” Sansa said

“I’m gonna miss you too.” Arya said “But probably less” she joked. They all laughed. Arya continued “So Sansa, Robb told me you’re going back to uni.” Arya said

“I’m.” she replied “I will just finish my year as CEO of Stark Industries and give Robb the vacation he needed, then I will be back and finish my degree.”

“Are you gonna be ok?” she said a little worried. She didn’t want her sister to have a hard time after all she had been through at uni.

“Yeah. I really want to finish my degree. I’m getting a lot of help from Bran and I’m sure he will help Robb when he returns. Bran is incredible, guys. He learned everything about the industries so well and so fast. He is very grounded and is so wise for his age, but didn’t lose his kindness.” Sansa smiled gently and looked at her younger brother

“He is probably gonna be a better CEO than you and Robb” Arya joked also looking at Bran with care.

“He definitely will!” Sansa said. There was no jealousy in her voice, just affection. And Arya though on how Sansa changed. Sansa continued “Stark Industries is not mine, or Robb’s. It belongs to all of us. It’s ours” she looked with care to Jon and Ygritte and Arya.

They all smiled at her. Yes, they all had their place, both in the Industries and in their family. They belonged.

“Also, I think your brother might have a crush on this girl” Ygritte said pointing at Bran and Meera. They all looked at Bran acting a little weird towards her. They could swear he was both embarrassed, but also trying to impress her somehow.

“What? No!” Sansa said shocked.

They all laughed at her reaction

“Why are you so shocked? Bran is a big boy now!” Jon said calm, but wanting to tease her a little bit

“No, he’s not! He’s just a baby. My baby, I’m not ready!” Sansa replied

“Sansa, you’re dating Theon!” Arya said teasingly “You’re not in a position to poke fingers at other people’s love lives.”

They all laughed again. It was so good when laugher came so easily now for them.

Sansa continued “Also, Theon is coming with me to finish his degree a well. I won’t be alone.”

“ _He_ is finishing his degree?” Arya asked in disbelief

“What? Theon is really smart!” Sansa said

“Blinded by love” Arya rolled her eyes

“Yeah, I know how the feel” Ygritte joked and grinned at Jon who just grinned back at her. They all laughed.

Theon sometimes looked at Sansa from afar. He was talking to Podrick and at that moment he could feel they were talking about him, because they all looked at him, so he took it as an invitation and decided to intrude in their conversation

“Hey, what’s going on?” he asked casually, kissing Sansa on the forehead and wrapping his arms around her.

“ _You_ are determined to finish you degree?” Arya repeated with the same tone

“Why you sound so surprised?” he asked teasingly

“Nothing, I just thought that in our pack, you were the most likely to be a drop out and live after you family’s money” she replied bluntly

“Ouch. I think I deserved this.” He joked. He didn’t care about anymore and mostly he knew that Arya was not saying this in a mean way, but more like a jokingly way. He continued “I don’t know if you know, but I have no money anymore. Everything I had belongs to my sister now.”

“What? So you are like… broke? Sansa is dating a broke guy?” she joked but in a affectionate tone.

Sansa just rolled her eyes and laughed.

“But really, who is gonna get you all the fancy stuff you like?” Arya teased

“I can get them myself if I want, you know.” Sansa replied.

Yes, she could. No more dreaming that a prince charming would give here everything she wanted. She could get and achieve what she wanted herself. She had to stand up for herself.

And love was like this as well, she wouldn’t be with someone perfect, that would meet all her expectation in every way and all the time, but someone with flaws and doubts and problems of their own.

Someone real. Someone she cared about and cared about her in return. Someone she respected and she could trust. A partner to share a life, the good and the bad. A best friend she loved.

And she loved Theon, with all her heart.

“Yes, queen!” Arya said louder.

They all laughed.

“And Theon has got an amazing project he’s working on” Sansa said softly

Theon smiled a little shy on having her complimenting him

“Thanks for that, love. It’s weird to say that but, I finally feel free and ready for a fresh start. While I was finishing my job with Yara, I found out that I really like investments so I was thinking about creating an investment start up, but focusing on depolluting the ocean… I wanna know more about this and that’s why I want to go back to uni and finish my degree.”

“This is really cool” Jon said sincerely

“Yeah!” Arya said sincerely and Sansa looked at him proudly. Theon had come a long way. So did she. So did Arya, Jon, Robb, Bran, her mother, all of their family.

“If you wanna save the environment, maybe you could start by switching your Land Rover for a Prius, man!” Arya joked.

“Yeah, let’s take smaller steps, right?” Theon said laughing

They all laughed.

“I’m so glad you are staying here for a while.” Sansa said to Jon and Ygritte

“Yeah, me too. I wanted to talk to you guys and sort things so we could start this project we had for a while. It seems like the proper moment now.” Jon smiled

“When it’s set we will be able to help a lot of orphan children in need.” Ygritte said

“You guys are fucking awesome!” Arya said “Also, I bet the experience I gave you, while I was staying in will help you deal with some punk kids”

They all laughed. Then they realized in a couple of hours they wouldn’t be able to see Arya every day for a while. Sansa asked sweetly:

“After your journey, are you planning to come back home, Arya?”

“Of course, it’s _home_.” She smiled.

They were all together and all seemed well

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic I had the courage to post and I'm still terrified. I just put too much of me in it.  
> But I had the best time writing. This is how I would like it to end. Hope you enjoy


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